I need you to be my miracle
by cdaye8184
Summary: Damon is a cold-hearted oncologist who promised never to care about his patients. What starts off as a search for sex turns into a heart warming story of two broken people. Damon knows the risk but he had to take it, he was drawn to her.
1. I

_1. I need you to be my miracle _

Life in the oncology field is no simple task. Nobody realized what they go through. Nobody realizes what Damon Salvatore goes through on a daily basis. He treats patients, young and old who have been diagnosed with cancer, leukemia to be more precise. It is especially hard to watch little children who are barely old enough to walk come into his clinic, fighting for their life. Over nearly a decade of study and nearly five years of work experience, he's become immune to feeling for his patients; no longer distinguishing any difference between them. When he should feel pain, sympathy or regret, he doesn't. He feels nothing, he won't let himself. Damon arrives at work, performs his daily tasks and then leaves. It was never anything more, anything less. Not since his first year of work anyway.

Damon knew what he was signing up for that warm April day in his second last year of university when he stepped foot into the hospital as an intern doing his residency. At first, it wasn't so bad. He just checked in newly diagnosed patients, studied the doctors' ways and acted as the assistant he was. But as time progressed, Damon realized what oncology was all about. He walked into work one day and his assigned doctor was working with a patient, a little girl whose name was Lily. She had gone through the chemotherapy, that he was certain of. She had lost all of her precious blonde hair, her little face was as pale as snow and her eyes contained black pockets underneath them that made her look constantly tired. Lily had been diagnosed with acute lymphoblastic leukemia just six months before Damon had arrived and she was near the peak of her cancer. The day he first seen her was the day they had discovered her white blood cell count to be atrocious.

The bone marrow transplant she had received weeks prior to the appointment had rejected, worsening her symptoms to the point of no return. He had heard the other doctor mention a girl with leukemia who wasn't responding well to treatment a couple days before. He hadn't imagined it to be like this though. Exactly one week after her check up that Damon had been to, little Lily passed away.

It was a heartbreaking event for Damon. He had witnessed his first out of many deaths, and it been a little girl; a little girl who hadn't had the time to live at any extent. She was five, Damon was in his mid twenties at the time and he felt as if he had hardly lived. So much hurt had passed through his body that day, he had cried when he got home later that night unable to do anything else. He secluded himself in his apartment and simply stayed on the couch all night, little Lily never leaving his thoughts for a second.

After that night, it took him nearly a week to even conge up the nerve to return back to the hospital. He knew it would have been like this, he knew being a doctor this is what he signed up for. There was the responsibility of being strong. He just didn't fathom the fact that he could not deal with it. But he could, and he would. And then his heart grew cold.

It took him a while but he built himself up stronger and stronger as patients blurred into a population and he didn't bother remembering their names. Children would come in, with no hair and bruised eyes. The compassion would begin to surface from within and before it had the chance to overwhelm him, he would ignore it; refusing it to appear. That made it easier. That made him the excellent doctor he is that allowed him to perform his job to the best of his abilities. Damon still cared in a sense; he just chose not to care about the people around him that he was treating. It was easier to feel constantly numb than to feel either bit of pain that lurked through his body.

That had worked for nearly five years until a certain fear filled, mahogany haired, chocolate doe eyed young woman walked into his clinic for testing to hear that she had recently diagnosed leukemia. Her name was Elena Gilbert.

* * *

Damon Salvatore, both doctor and lover sat in the visitor chair next to the hospital bed, his eyes puffy and pink from crying and rubbing. Next to him in the hospital bed, lay Elena, his soul mate—his wife. She no longer looked the way she had when he first met her and to a new set of eyes, she was not the same person; externally anyway.

Her mahogany hair that he had grown to love had disappeared. There were no traces of hair left on her pretty little head. Her body weight went from approximately one hundred and twenty pounds to one hundred pounds, and her being a fairy tall women, her decrease in weight was very noticeable. Her face had sunken in, every single rib was visible, and her hipbones popped out in a very disturbingly way. But it was hidden, hidden by the plain white hospital gown that had shielded her body for weeks now and the blankets. The blankets that covered her delicate body. She was always either very warm or very cold, but never getting out of those blankets.

At first glance looking around the room, it would look like a typical hospital room occupied by an ill patient. But to Damon and Elena, it was a prison, death row perhaps. The ways were the color of paste, and bare. Situated in the middle of the room was the single hospital bed. To the left of the hospital bed was Damon, the visitor chair and a little table filled with flowers and get well soon cards. To the right of the bed were the heart monitor and the intravenous machine, connected to the shell of a woman in the bed beside it. Tubes flowed into Elena's wrist which leaked in the clear liquid that relieved her most of her pain. And that was it, nothing more claimed a space in the room other than a picture frame, and inside that frame was a picture taken almost two year ago of Damon and Elena on a beach completely consumed in each other's love.

The picture had such meaning to both of them. It had been where they confessed their love to each other. And they say a picture is worth a thousand words. Well that couldn't be truer with this photo. It truly captured their love as her hair blew gracefully with the wind. Eyes twinkling and locked, they stared into each other's soul, their hands intertwined, and their bodies like one. A true smile was on Damon's face for what seemed like the first time in years. There was a beautiful pink and orange sunset in the background, a one that reflected off the water and the white sand perfectly. There were no words for this picture other than perfect and it was the only bit of happiness or joy left inside that white hospital room.

* * *

While Elena continued to remain in a deep slumber, recovering from her earlier sickness attack, Damon remained at the hospital, on her beside. He refused to leave even though he should. His hands rested on the edge of the bed with his head lodged upon them. His eyes were closed as he listening to the constant beeping of the heart monitoring machine. The rhythm had been the same for a few hours now because of her relaxation.

Beep.

Beep.

Beep.

Beep.

He felt her stir beside him so he sat up, examining her features. She had shifted from lying on her back to turning in the direction of Damon. He admired her beauty despite how visible her sickness really was. When she was asleep, she looked at peace. There was no longer a twisted face from pain or nausea. He wished she could feel this content all the time while she were awake, never experiencing another drop of pain for as long as she lives but he knew that wasn't the case. If she survived this, there would always be the constant struggle of recovery. But that was a major if, it was an if that Damon wanted to think of as a when so bad. Her chemotherapy would seem almost easy compared what life had left to throw at her which she didn't deserve. Damon watched how over the years her cancer consumed her. For nearly two years she showed no symptoms, which were the time of their bonding but ever since there it has been going downhill at a rapid rate.

Damon was forced out of his thoughts due to the instant increase in her heart rate. He glanced toward the monitor which was now in full tilt, the beeps going at a way faster velocity than normal. He jumped up moving over to Elena shaking her calling her name.

"Elena" He pled. "Elena, wake up!" His calls grew more urgent and desperate but she refused to move. Her heartbeat only continued to speed as Damon grew more and more frantic, shaking her harder and harder. He couldn't get her to wake up.

Suddenly, her eyes shot open and the machine returned to normal, slowly down gradually. Damon sighed in relief as he stood by Elena's side, grabbing her hand with the two of his being very gentle because of her IV. He began massaging her ring finger with his middle one fondling with the ring.

The ring was exquisite; of course it was with Damon being a doctor and all. Her ring was a 14 gold caret diamond wedding ring with embroiled diamonds throughout the band. The ring showcased a unique princess diamond in the center that was shaped like a square. Elena had squealed when she first laid her eyes upon it, Damon could still remember that day as if it were yesterday. It was one of the best days of his life.

"Thank god." Damon said still recovering. "You nearly scared me to death."

"I'm sorry." She chuckled as best she could, her weakness overcoming her.

"No you're not." Damon said confused. "You have nothing to be sorry for Elena. Everything is going to be alright." He squeezed her hand a little in reassurance giving her a quick smile. It was hard for Damon to smile lately, especially since she's gotten worst.

"It doesn't hurt anymore." Elena said smiling more to herself than to Damon. She could not even remember the last time she was free from some kind of sickness whether it be her temperature, her nausea, her chemo, a bad stomach, any kind of sickness. Elena always had one or the other, or all.

"I'm glad it doesn't."

"I actually feel really good. There isn't any nausea, any pain nor am I hot or cold." She said still smiling. Elena couldn't recall the last time she felt this normal.

"All the better, kitten." He agreed calling her by the nickname that he'd given her long ago. She loved when he called her that and he loved calling her that. She didn't really have a nickname for him; she always said she loved the name Damon so she refused to call him anything else.

"I'm feeling a little tired though." Elena added softly.

"It's crazy how much you sleep you know that right?" Damon smirked. "Take another nap kitten; I'll be right here when you wake up."

She smiled at him locking her eyes with his. "I love you, Damon".

"I love you too, Elena. I always will." He promised placing a kiss on her hand right on top of the ring and then in the middle of her palm before letting it go and then giving a sincere kiss on her lips before she closed her eyes and slept, a love struck smile still plastered on her face.

Her heart beat had finally slowed down, and was now beating at its normal pace but Damon noticed that it continued to slow down. He watched the monitor move along, and makes its waves but his vision locked on the numbers.

Sixty

Fifty

Forty-five

Forty-two

Thirty-five

Twenty-three

Twenty

Fifteen

Ten

Nine

Eight

Seven

Six

Five

Four

Three

Two

One

Zero

A single tear rolled down Damon's face as he freaked out crying out her name. The nurses rushed in with a defibrillator and Damon took over from there. He screamed her name while he shocked her body. Everything seemed to be in slow motion. The cringing beep carried out for what seemed like forever as a life slipped away. Her life. His life.

* * *

**AN/** So here's the beginning of my new idea. I don't know what else to say other than I hope my writing did justice to what I have planned in my head and I can't wait for all of you to start this new, wonderful journey with me. This was probably the hardest thing I have had to write but I think it turned out fairly well.

A huge shout out to my girl who was like my beta for this chapter_. _Thank you LiveBreatheVampire , so so so much. Everybody go check out her stories, she's currently writing a few and they are all simply AMAZING, just like her :)

_Let me know what you thought of this chapter by leaving a review :) _


	2. II

** II**

It was a typical Monday morning when Dr. Salvatore strolled through the hospital heading to his office. He hated the hospital, it was too bland. It would be appealing to have at least a little bit of color here and there instead of just white. Damon walked past all of his co-workers with his usual strut, muttering a good morning here and there but still looking straight ahead, never taking his eyes off the white, dull hallway in front of him.

Making his way to his office, he pulled out his keys, unlocked the door and stepped inside, removing his jacket and throwing it over his chair. He logged onto his computer when he heard a gentle knock on the other end of the door, signaling Andy's arrival.

"Come in, Andy." Damon called, a slight hint of irritation already seeping from his voice.

Entering, the woman called Andy came forward with a bunch of folders, which contained records and information about all of the patients Damon would be seeing today. "Good morning, Dr. Salvatore" She purred handing him the folders.

Taking them from her, he muttered thanks before saying "Cut the doctor shit Andy, we're way past that." Indeed they were. They were, well… fuck buddies. Of course nobody knew that, it was wrong to sleep with a co-worker especially the secretary. But Damon liked Andy more than he liked most people; she was there whenever he needed her, whenever he needed a distraction. He called, she answered or vice versa.

Andy was an appealing woman. She had long golden hair, defined cheek bones and a slender figure. She always wore a sophisticated suit with heels but underneath, she possessed some of the sexiest lingerie that Damon had ever seen. She never failed to surprise him with her kinkiness. She liked to be with him everywhere. You name it, and they had sex there. His office, her office—desk, the cafeteria, the janitor's closet, basically everywhere in the hospital as well as his condo and her apartment.

It was no secret that she had a thing for Damon, both of them knew it. She knew though, that their relationship would not get past fucking and she was okay with that but some times, she wanted more. He didn't but she did. She had known him every since he'd interned there at The Grace Toronto hospital. He wasn't a people person, hell to her, he didn't seem to like anybody. He pushed everyone away, giving them the cold shoulder. Most colleagues knew each other quite well, and that was the case for the rest of her crew, all except Damon. He went home as soon as work finished, he left for dinner, and the times he did stay he ate in silence by himself in his office.

Sighing, Andy agreed. "Yeah, I guess we are." She glanced around his room like she did every morning and the same little picture sat on his desk caught her eye each day. It was a photo of a beautiful little girl with long blonde hair and huge brown eyes. That picture had been there every since his first day of work. Andy had always been curious about it, but never dared to ask.

"So, is that all?" Damon asked, slightly annoyed by her presence. She should have left by now, she was bugging him.

Andy hated when he acted like that. When they were together, he was different—still distance but nicer, at least. "Yup." She said, popping the P and turning on her heels swaying her ass as she walked out his office door. "I'll see you around Damon" She purred blowing him a kiss and disappearing behind the wooden frame.

He shook his head, bringing his attention to the files. "Who do we have today?" He muttered to himself, skimming through the list of people. Perfect, three children today. He hated days he had children. He had to act normal extra hard, trying not to cave in to their sweet nature. There were a handful of teenagers, half a dozen adults and a few old seniors. It was going to be an alright day, minus the children. He rolled his eyes and set the folders down on his desk and looked over at the clock. 8:15a.m, he still had fifteen minutes to go before his first client rolled in.

* * *

Overall, his morning had gone well. He had gotten all of the kids out of the way, giving him a remaining stress-free day for the most part. It hadn't gone too bad anyway. One child was delivered the news that she had successfully received her bone marrow transplant according to plan, the other just had a check-up checking for abnormal cells and the last little girl started her first round of chemotherapy. She had been the hardest to see. She didn't look sick yet, but the poor little thing looked so sad; almost as if she thought she was going to die tomorrow, and she was only six! He couldn't find it in him to act like a total dick to her and her family. He told them what he thought, that if all went well she would successfully get rid of the cancer and then he handed her a simple lollipop giving her a little half-hearted smile as she, her mother and father walked out the door.

* * *

After heading to the cafeteria for a quick snack, Damon was back in his office munching on an apple looking over his next patient.

The name wasn't familiar. Elena Gilbert. She had tests sent away last week because her first doctor mentioned some symptoms being present that weren't normal in a young woman. He quickly scanned over her chart, quickly figuring out she was 5'6'', approximately one hundred and thirty pounds and she had brown eyes and her driver's license. She was as normal as any other woman, this wouldn't be too bad.

Well, to Elena's disappointment, she was going to receive some bad news today at their appointment because his lab technicians had just detected abnormal cell growth in her bone marrow cells, finding it to be a case of myelogenous leukemia. To anybody outside of the medical field, it would just be called leukemia but this was Damon's way of differentiating between the types. This type has to do with her bone marrow cells and the responsibilities of forming red blood cells, platelets and certain other types of white blood cells would eventually be affected.

Damon closed up the new patient's folder just as what he guessed was her quiet knock making itself known on the door.

"It's open." He called spinning the chair around to face the woman as she entered but was surprised when he became stunned by her beauty.

The lady before him did not look sick. In fact, she looked like a goddess, cheesy as that was but it was true. Her skin tone was olive and her body was tall and slender; she had the right amount of curves in all the perfect places giving her a slim hour glass figurine of a body. The brown eyes he had read about in her file didn't come close to comparing to what he seen now. She had large, beady chocolate brown eyes that looked almost puppy-like. You didn't see eyes like that everyday, hers were mesmerizing

Physical features aside she had mid-back length mahogany hair that looked so silky and soft. Damon just wanted to reach out and run his hands through it as she walked in smiling and took a seat across from him and his desk.

_Keep it in your pants, Damon._ He warned himself. It wasn't like he hadn't slept with attractive women that were his patients before, because he had more times than he could count; but that didn't happen right away. He usually didn't acknowledge whichever woman it was, they flirted with him, wanted him. He just tagged along for the ride. With Elena, something wasn't right but he ignored it, greeting her and shaking her hand, forcing her a smirk that he knew made the ladies weak in the knees. He knew it was kind of sadistic, sleeping with his patients that had cancer, ridded cancer or wanted to know if he had cancer but he was a man and a man has needs. That's all Damon wanted from them. Sex. Satisfaction. And he would get Elena Gilbert in his bed, it was a just a matter of when and where.

The woman in front of him cleared her throat and when he looked at her, she seemed distressed, almost impatient. "Sorry" Damon apologized not really meaning it. "My mind went elsewhere for a moment. I'm a space cadet." She laughed at his humor and held out her hand, ready to shake his.

"Well, Dr. Space Cadet, I am Elena Gilbert, it is a pleasure to meet you." She said while giggling.

Damon grabbed her hand but not to shake. He surprised her by bringing her soft, tiny hand to his mouth, placing a gentle kiss stunning Elena. His lips made her skin tingle; it made it feel like it was on fire. "You can just call me Dr. Salvatore, it's my more professional name and the pleasure is all mine, Miss Gilbert"

"Okay, _Dr. Salvatore._" She said testing it out before asking the million dollar question. "I take it my results came back. How were they?" Her voice went frail and her eyes locked onto his waiting for the words that could change her life and would change her life.

"Yes Elena. Do you mind if I call you Elena?" She shook her head. "Great. Well the results came in some couple days ago." He took a deep breath trying to act like he was concerned and that he cared but in reality he didn't, and he never would. "I don't think there is any simple way to tell you this Elena but we found what we had expected. Our researchers have come across abnormal cells in your bone marrow, but they are very young. You have a case of acute myelogenous leukemia, acute meaning on its first stage." He glanced at the woman who looked back at him with tears in her eyes and her hands over her mouth.

"Is it curable?" She asked. Her life had been shattered, she had hoped to walk into this new doctor's office today and be greeted with wonderful news.

"There is treatment. It can be curable, but not always." He told her. "We would have to start you on chemotherapy and eventually when the symptoms worsen you'll need to have a bone marrow transplant." The only part of that sentence that she had heard was when. When the symptoms worsen.

"So there's no way around it progressing?" She sobbed into her hands.

"It's too early to tell for sure." He honestly answered. "We're looking into it as much as we can. I'd need to run some more tests, simple tests that will determine exactly how far along you are because right now all I know is that you've recently developed leukemia. I know everything has piled upon you at once, but I really need to schedule your tests, is that alright?"

She barely nodded. She was incapable of doing anything else at the moment but the hardest part of it was over, she found out she had cancer. Of course life would throw a thousand curve balls at her within the near future but Elena looked at the glass as half full. She believed—hoped that her abnormal cells were so new that they would be easy to detect, treat and resolve. She would do the chemotherapy, perhaps need a bone marrow transplant and after that, it would all work out. She would be a survivor. That's what she was. Little did she know how wrong she had been.

Damon glanced at his appointments, noticing that he was free this same time, next Monday morning. "Is this exact time next Monday okay with you?"

"Yes."

"I'm sorry about your diagnosis, Elena." He gave her a sorrowing smile as she dismissed herself. "See you in a week."

"That will be the only good thing about the appointment. Take care" She closed the door behind her leaving a smirking Damon. It had started already, she had received terrible news this morning but she had still flirted with him before leaving. She would be easy to get, he was sure of it.

* * *

Elena left the hospital feeling almost the way she had entered which wasn't right. She had found out she had leukemia but yet, her mood was content. It had to be the new doctor, Damon was it? She giggled at the memory of Dr. Space cadet. For a doctor, he was actually gorgeous. She hadn't seen a man as beautiful as him in quite some while. He had electrifying blue orbs for eyes that shimmered like a crystal. He had raven-black hair that was short but yet fell in wisps' around his perfectly structured face. He was so sexy and he seemed to know it too. She began to think of all the things he knew elsewhere, outside of the hospital. _Stop it Elena._ She demanded herself consciously. She'd never think things like that, especially after bad news, especially after just meeting the guy. He had messed with her brain, it was his looks. She was going to have to look past it; she had too many problems to get head over heels for her oncologist.

Getting in her simply blue ford car, she drove home to her apartment to deliver the bad news.

* * *

Elena's roommate was her brother, Jeremy. Since their parents died two years ago, he moved in with her while going to college. Neither of them had taken it very lightly but it affected Jeremy the most and for a while, he depended on Elena pretty much for his survival. He went into a state of depression, turning to alcohol and nearly flunking school but his sister had managed to smarten him up, and they grieved over their parents' together. It had gotten easier, as the months went by. They relied on each other and were never apart. Eventually, Jeremy started laughing and smiling again, which only lifted Elena's spirit and they've been back to normal for over a year.

As Elena entered their two-bedroom apartment, she tried to rehearse how to break the news to Jeremy. She hadn't even told him she had gotten tested for anything, let alone to be diagnosed with cancer. It would come as a shock to him, and it would devastate him. She knew that her little brother would take it worst than she did.

"Hey, 'Lena." Jeremy hollered over the couch he was sprawled out on, watching television. Her brother didn't really look like her but they both shared dark hair. He had green eyes, and his body was very muscular. He enjoyed sports, especially since he started college. He had been on many of their varsity teams.

"Hi Jer." She greeted back, not quite as enthusiastic as he had.

"What's wrong?" He could read her like a book. He knew her better than anybody did. He was after all, her brother and her roommate. She had no chance of escaping secrets with him, especially something like this.

"Jer, there's something I have to tell you" She walked over to the couch hovering above him not knowing where to start.

"Okay…" He waited for her to say something but she didn't. She just continued to glare at him, her posture fixated like a statue.

Elena, what's wrong?" Jeremy was genuinely concerned. He knew that something was bothering his sister. "Did someone hurt you?"

Elena sighed, trying to ease his mind when she realized that his face changed from concerned to wary. "No, Jeremy..." But she couldn't keep herself together anymore. She broke down, sobbing, and Jeremy instantly wrapped his arms around her. "Elena, I'm here for you...Just tell me what's wrong."

Elena continued to sob in his chest, but then she pulled away to face him. "Jeremy, a few days ago I wasn't feeling well for a while now. I would get sick for no apparent reason every now and again. I didn't know what to do. I didn't want to tell you because I didn't want to have you worried..." She wiped a tear away from her cheek as she felt Jeremy stiffen in front of her.

"I went to the hospital to get some tests."

She paused to see if she got any reaction from Jeremy. The latter was just staring blankly at the wall, as if he was preparing himself for the worst.

"Jeremy...I have leukemia."

* * *

Damon was itching with confusion. That Elena really had him stirred up and he couldn't figure out what to do with himself. He wanted her. That was clear as crystal it's just he couldn't, not yet… but he would.

His nature got the best of him as arousing scenarios of him and Elena played into his head. He thought of all the different places they could be, all the different positions. He grunted in frustration as he paced around the dining room of his condo, a little too excited for his own good. He needed to feel relief. He pulled his cell phone out of his pocket and speed dialed Andy's number by just pressing number three, she practically answered on the first ring.

"_Damon" _She greeted him through the other side of the phone. _"To what do I owe the pleasure of your attention?"_

"I need you to come over, now." He claimed, trying to make his voice sound as seductive as he could.

"_I figured"_ The blond woman sighed. _"Always the booty call"._

"Well that's what you're here for isn't it?" He didn't allow her anytime to answer. "Seriously, can you make it in like twenty minutes? Thirty tops?"

She chuckled into the phone. _"Why do I have to be so imbecilic? You call and…" _She snapped her fingers into the phone. _"… and I'm there like that. Whenever, wherever, whatever the reason." _Her voice held agitation as the volume of it rose with each word. _"What would you do if I stopped this no-strings-attached nonsense? You'd wind up having blue balls." _This earned a snort from Damon but he could tell she were dead serious. He was actually pretty amazed that she agreed to this for as long as she had.

"I like the sex. You _love_ the sex. It's a win-win situation." He proclaimed trying to win her over. He needed her tonight. "We give each other satisfaction whenever the other needs it. Personally, I do not see anything wrong with that. Two friends—co-workers, having casual sex and not having to worry about anything else, it's perfect." Breathing in heavily, he gave it one last shot. "So… Andy darling, what do you say?" He purred her voice, knowing she was unable to resist him.

"_I'm on my way."_ She replied with no sign of excitement in her voice, just banausic and then she hung up.

* * *

She arrived nearly a half hour later, Damon waited on the couch for her wearing a simple pair of dark jeans and a matching black t-shirt. She strolled in wearing the whole nine-yards. She was wearing a blouse that showed maximum cleavage, a skirt that she had hauled up to make it short, very short and a pair of black stilettos that accentuated her calves making her legs so lean, sexy and firm. She looked quite sexy tonight, ravishing really. She would definitely be a distraction.

"You rang" She joked while leaning against the wall. She must have cooled down on her drive over. Of course she had, she was about to have sex with Damon Salvatore.

"I did. Quite the speedy delivery too I must say." He stood up making his way over to her, grabbing a hold of her thighs pulling her closer to him. "I think you deserve a tip for being so expeditive." Winking, Andy caught on.

"Oh, really? And what kind of tip are you going to give me?" She purred back, running her hands along his chest before going underneath the shirt and doing the same movements.

"My tip." It seemed natural to talk this way to her. It was safe to say they were very experimental. Before she had the chance to respond he crashed his lips onto hers his desire well past the point of no return.

She began guiding them to the couch where he had been moments ago, their mouths still attached, he began pulling up her skirt just as she began unbuttoning and unzipping his jeans. She pulled them down across his ankles to reveal that he wasn't wearing boxers. She broke free from his lips and raised an eyebrow at him, trying not to laugh. "Going commando is a new fashion, is it?"

"No." He said. "It's just easier not to wear any when you know they are going to be across your ankles anyway."

"True" She didn't bother wasting anymore time. Their lips crashed for the final time as he positioned himself quickly and then entered her.

He was no longer having sex with Andy though. As he picked up his pace and neared his climax while she rode through hers, his mind travelled to that mysterious patient of his, urging him to release instantly. And it worked.

* * *

A little while later he and Andy lay on the couch, she was sprawled on top of him, her skirt still up and his pants still down, trying to regain their breath.

"That was just as I had expected it" Andy said earning a questioning gaze from Damon. "Amazing." It was summed up in one simple word.

"Of course it was." He agreed. "Everything about me is amazing."

"No need to go getting too cocky, you know." She glared at him placing a simple kiss on his cheek.

"Too late." He smirked back at her before attempting to get up, signaling her to get off him. "Anyway it's getting late. I think you should go."

"Already?" She asked slightly disappointed.

"What else do you have to stay for?" He shot back.

"I thought maybe I could make us something to eat and we could watch a movie." She smiled at him, a genuine smile. One that she had never seen from him.

"Or not. I'm tired Andy, this isn't a date." He was becoming annoyed the more she talked.

"I guess you're right… maybe some other time" She trailed off, standing up, pulling her skirt down and smoothing out the wrinkles, knowing that a date with him would never come. "I'll see you tomorrow morning. Sleep tight, Damon." She blew him a kiss as she let herself out of his condo but she didn't receive one back in return. She hadn't expected to, it was just something she always did.

"Bye, Andy." He called behind the now closed now, not sure if she had heard him or not, his smirk still prominent on his features. He really didn't care if she had heard him. He was actually exhausted, that had been just what he needed to end off the day.

* * *

Finally ready for bed, Damon set his alarm, turned the lights off and got in his king-sized bed, which was actually quite lonely. He would never admit it, but he seldom wished he had somebody to share it with. His mind wondered back to Elena for a moment as he drifted into sleep, his eyes going heavy and his mind going blank. The last thoughts he had were of Lily, and all the other children that had died under his hands—not necessarily because of him, but practically in front of him. Besides his sweet Lily, there had been nine—in six years. That night, Damon fell asleep feeling pitiful, cold and lonely.

* * *

** AN/ This chapter set's up the characters a little more, it's going to take a while before their relationship starts budding but I've got an idea what I want to happen :) I hope you guys all liked it, I never made the sex really graphic so I left the rating at T, but just a heads up, it may get changed to M in the future, I haven't decided yet.**

PS.. A huge, huge thank you to Amy (LiveBreatheVampire) for being my beta this chapter and helping me with the ending Jeremy/Elena scene, your much appreciated girl, love ya :) Everybody check her out, she is amazing!

**Feel free to leave me a review, a hello, anything :) **


	3. III

III

* * *

"Elena… what the hell are you talking about?" Jeremy yelled. His face had been completely flushed of every color pigment that it once had and was now grotesquely pale.

"I am talking about cancer, Jer. I'm sick." His sister's voice was fear-filled but she tried to hide it. Elena didn't know anymore about this cancer than Jeremy did, apart from the fact that it was new which she was about to tell him. "My oncologist told me the cancer cells are fairly new, in fact; he said they managed to locate them in the first stage which is a great thing." She forced her brother a smile, trying to be the role-model. She was always the strong one, it was never Jeremy.

"It's a great thing?" He barked back. "It's not a great thing Elena. It's just a convenience for the doctors. Catching it early one does not guarantee you being cured does it?" She shook her head glancing at Jeremy before her eyes settled on television. She didn't want to look at him, not right now. "No, I didn't think so. When were you going to fucking tell me that you were sick, Elena? If you didn't go to the hospital you wouldn't have even known!" He threw his hands in the air, his face turning from pale ivory to red now.

"Jeremy calm down. Exactly! If I didn't go to the hospital, I wouldn't even have known I have cancer! I would have told you if I thought that it was serious!" She began to yell back. "The only symptoms I had were a fever, fatigue, and I had a little lump on the side of my stomach, I didn't think anything of it! I thought the fever and being tired all the time was just me catching a cold. It wasn't until I found a little bump right there…" She pointed to the left side of her stomach, just below her ribcage "…that I wanted to get it checked out. I went to the walk in clinic and they took my blood work and my results came back very… _intriguing_ was the word the doctors used. They told me they were going to send it away so they could know for sure and today Dr. Salvatore informed me the horrible news." His sister lowered her voice again as she finished talking and finished with a shrug. She didn't know what else to do. She was on the brink of tears, her eyes were glistening and she was trying so hard to pull herself together. If she seemed weak in front of Jeremy, then he would take it the wrong way. She couldn't let that happen.

Jeremy began to notice her uneasiness. He closed the distance between them and pulled her into a comforting embrace. While Elena's chin rested on her brother's shoulder, she couldn't help but shed a couple tears as her mind started going into overdrive. She began thinking about treatment, and the cost of everything. How would she afford it? She wasn't making that much money and what happened if the treatment didn't work and she died? Jeremy would be left with nobody; he would be all by himself.

She pulled away from Jeremy, wiping away the few tears that still remained on her cheeks. "Everything will be fine, Jer." She assured him between sobs. "We will get through this. We always get through it, together." She offered him her pinky swearing him to a pinky promise.

For as long as Elena could remember (which was quite some time since she had turned 25 on the 23rd of February) her relationship with her brother who was just three years younger than her was great. Her brother, who had turned 22 on February 18th, was all she had left. All while growing up, they always made deals, oaths and promises to each other but each one would never be completely set in stone unless sealed with a pinky promise. It was just something they had become accustomed to and even now while they were adults, they still pinky promised. It was a good thing because it reminded them of their childhood and how simple everything once was.

Jeremy squeezed out a tiny laugh. "Now you know you need to get better, you just promised me."

"I promised you we would get through this; you know I can't promise that I'll get better." She used a soothing tone in her voice, trying not to upset her brother anymore than she had already this evening. She changed the subject not wanting for the atmosphere to get any more depressing. "Is there anything good on TV?"

"Not really." He shrugged in response finally moving away from Elena and sitting back on the couch, picking up the remote and scanning through the channels to make sure he hadn't missed any decent movies or shows. "Nope, there's nothing."

Elena walked over to the couch as well and seated beside him resting her head on his shoulder. "That's fine. Do you want to watch a movie? It's only seven. I still have three hours before I have to go to sleep."

"Sure." He agreed. "Anything you request?"

Elena began to think, not wanting to watch something either of them had already seen but she really wanted to see this one in particular. "Can we watch a walk to Remember?"

Jeremy slowly turned his head toward her raising an eyebrow at her before his face went blank. "It's a bit ironic giving the current circumstances don't you think?"

"I know… but we have to get used to the idea and there's no point to ignore any cancer-filled topic just because your sister has it. It's a classic and you know it's my favorite movie. Pretty please…" She turned toward him giving him the best puppy-dog look that she could muster up. Her big beady eyes glared into her brothers and her bottom lip puckered over her top one. How would he be able to resist his adorable sister?

Jeremy groaned in defeat. "Fine." He rolled his eyes. "But tomorrow night you're watching Men in Black with me." He crossed his arms and stuck his face up in the air trying to prove his point as the movie began.

"It looks like we have a deal." They pinky promised once again and then both of them concentrated on the movie, Elena still leaning against her brother.

By the time the movie ended, Jeremy had already fallen asleep leaving Elena all by herself to finish it. She turned off the television with the remote, did her usual nightly ritual for bed and went to sleep. She had a long day ahead of her tomorrow; she was still going to go to work until she couldn't. She felt fine anyway, and it wasn't like her job was hard. Elena worked in the fashion industry at Runway. She was the CEO and she was the person in charge of the magazines; she made each new collection look absolutely irresistible.

* * *

Damon woke up that morning the same as he had went to sleep and the same way he had waken up over the years—alone in his large queen size bed. It was hard for him to explain what it felt like being alone all of the time, because for the most part, it didn't bother him waking up to an empty bed. He had his daily routine—he wakes up, showers, grab a bagel and a coffee on the way to work, works all day, arrives home, eats and goes to sleep. There wasn't exactly a time of day that he could fit a person into his life anyway even if he wanted to. But there were certain days where the loneliness consumed him and overwhelmed him but Damon was the type of guy to bottle in his emotions. Never would Damon Salvatore express his feelings to anybody, he very seldom even told Andy anything personal and she was his closest acquaintance so to speak. When he bottled up his emotions for too long that was when _it_ happened. When he binged with alcohol and sex. If he let it go too far, that was when the random chicks would begin coming home with him, but when he tried to keep it under control it was mainly just Andy.

Damon drowned in his sorrows many nights with a bottle of bourbon all to himself. Too many nights did he venture to a nearby bar, pick up a random woman and fuck her senselessly, carelessly and violently. They seemed to like it, he liked it and it helped him, it numbed him. It was just too easy to lure any woman he wanted back to his condo the moment he played the doctor card. He'd be lying if he said he knew what he was doing was wrong, he was screwing himself up and wasting his life but this was his life. He didn't know any other way of coping and in his eyes, there wasn't anything wrong the way he was choosing to lead his life.

He brushed the feeling off, having no other choice as he pulled himself out of bed and began to perform his daily morning ritual. He did that every day that week, each morning grabbing a double double and a whole wheat bagel from Tim Horton's on his way to the hospital. The workers at the coffee shop's drive through knew his name and his usual by now, he was that consistent of a customer. They didn't exactly greet him with much enthusiasm because he always seemed so annoyed and impatient but every woman working there still giggled and blushed whenever they passed him his breakfast. Damon would barely acknowledge the ladies being head over heals for him, he would just thank them, grab his food and throw them a little smirk before driving off in his baby, a silver Bentley.

The week went by quicker than Damon had anticipated; he hadn't had any children this week which was always a great thing. His eyes wandered over to the corner of his desk every now and then though, where there lay a simple brown folder. Elena Gilbert's medical folder. She crossed his mind more than normal but less than enough for him to think anything seriously of it. He just thought she was extremely attractive because hell, she was. She was a fox, and he was going to get in her den.

* * *

Elena got through the week quite easily. The fact that she really enjoyed her job helped tremendously. She still found it fascinating even after three years of being there at Runway Fasion.

Elena spent the entire week prepping for the new winter collection that was being released next month. It took hours upon hours of dedication just sitting in her office but Elena wouldn't rather be anywhere else. She toyed around with pictures and captions, trying to capture the perfect cover to lure in her audience of fashionistas. She centered the theme of the winter collect for this year to be a mixture of reds, blue, teals, and grey's for the perfect contrast. She had been prepping and designing and modeling and planning and editing ever since the fall collection had been released at the beginning of September.

Aside from the fact that Elena actually got to model the clothes/outfits she designed and put together, the other _major_ upside to her job was the luxuries. She could not recall for the life of her the last time she had paid for her clothes. Not that it would really matter anyway considering the salary she was making being the CEO but their company allowed all employers a whole new wardrobe each season when the new collection came out. It was the beginning of each new season's month that Elena longed for. It was her reward, and each time she received the designer clothes she, herself had designed, she felt like a teenager who had just went on a free shopping spree, not that she knew the feeling but she imagined it to feel like that.

She loved her job, but it was hectic and the work didn't stop. That was one perk. It didn't really give her time to think about her diagnosis until she arrived at home late in the evenings to an empty apartment or a worry-filled Jeremy asking her how she felt that day. It had only been a week and he was already constantly nagging her and asking how she was. Surely her symptoms weren't going to progress as quickly as her brother suspected, right?

* * *

Friday evening after a very long, hectic day, Elena decided to swing by to Bree's

Pub not in between work and home. It was fairly tiny, usually isolated and the people were extremely friendly.

She was sitting at the bar sipping on the single light beer she had ordered. Just enough to calm her down, but not enough to impair her driving abilities. She was currently in the midst of making small talk with the owner and the bartender, Bree.

"Oh my stars, isn't he a beauty?" The middle aged but still beautiful dark woman exclaimed, completely ignoring what Elena had just said to her. Bree looked beyond Elena towards the entrance at what must be a good looking man so Elena decided to take a glimpse for herself. It was her doctor. What a coincidence.

"That's my doctor." Elena said as if it were nothing even though she was still slightly surprised.

"Oh really?" Bree raised an eyebrow. "Is Damon meeting you here?"

"No…wait." The younger woman paused eyeing Bree suspiciously. "How do you know his name Bree?"

"He's a usual." She said. "He's quite the charmer too."

"I've figured out that much" Elena rolled her eyes. Damon was over on the other side of the bar, his back facing Elena talking to two women that were flirtatiously touching his arms and laughing. He mustn't have seen her, she hoped he hadn't. That would be awkward; she had an appointment with him in two days plus she probably didn't look any good from her long day at work. Wait. Why was she thinking about what she looked like? She didn't want to impress him, why would she? He was close enough for Elena to tune into their three way conversation. The women were just bombarding him with questions and he would answer each one as he continued to drink his bourbon.

Elena tuned in and out of their conversation when Bree would interrupt her. Elena hadn't planned on staying any more than forty five minutes or so but it was going on an hour and twenty minutes now, she wanted to see what he was doing because she was just curious. He had already drunk four glasses of bourbon and from what she could tell, he was already slightly buzzed. There was only one woman left now, she had long black hair, she was pretty and she had big boobs which Damon kept glancing at and smirking.

Elena turned her head to the side one to see what they were up to which her eyes were revealed to a steamy make-out session.

"_Let's get out of here_." She heard the black haired girl purr to Damon.

"_Where to_?" He asked simply grabbing his leather coat and heading towards the door, the girl basically already humping him.

"_Your place_." That was all Elena heard before they both exited so she turned her full attention back to Bree who was laughing.

"What's so funny?" Elena asked, confused.

"He never fails." She said.

"I'm not following." Elena said, still unsure.

"Whenever he comes here, which is usually once or twice a week, he gets drunk and takes a girl home. He's a ladies man that one." Bree wiggled her eyebrows but Elena could only roll her eyes. She knew he seemed off, he seemed cold and careless. Not to mention the fact that he wasn't being very professional like and he was supposed to be a very well-respected doctor. She was curious about him now. Something wasn't right if he had an amazing job but chose to get drunk a few times a week. She guessed she would never know.

Elena said goodbye to Bree and left to drive home. The alcohol was way out of her system by now and she cussed herself for staying too long but it was a Friday night after all, she didn't really have anything else to do.

* * *

Damon was lying in bed with Harmony. No, Amy. Fuck he couldn't remember her name. Oh well, not like it mattered anyway. She'd wake up in a few hours and he'd tell her to leave. It was six am now, he gave her until about eight kind of wanting to sleep in a bit more himself to work off the slight hangover he was feeling. She couldn't really remember last night, the only part being at the bar talking to this woman and some other chick but she gave up competing with this one and left with another guy.

He dozed off for two hours and awoke again nearly eight thirty. He covered his lower body with the white sheets before he shook the woman, waking her up.

"Good morning." She greeted warmly, smiling and stretching.

"Morning." He muttered back.

"I don't have a hangover!" She exclaimed to herself, touching her head. "This never happens."

"That's great sweetheart." Damon said, sarcasm dripping from his voice.

"Well Damon, it looks like you woke up on the wrong side of the bed." She pouted.

"No, I woke up with a woman in my bed. I don't allow that." He spat at her. "By the way seeing as we're on first name basis, mind telling me yours?"

"You don't…" She trailed off, her face twisting in both confusion and disappointment. "It's Charity." Shit, he hadn't even guessed the right letter. He must have been really drunk last night. He couldn't even remember having sex with this woman but he clearly had, her hair was like a birds nest and she was naked. That was enough evidence right there. She noticed his hesitation and took no time in breaking the silence. "I'll forgive you. You gave me an amazing time last night." She winked.

"You couldn't have given me that amazing of a night then." He retorted. "Because I can't remember a damn thing. Now put on some clothes and let yourself out, I've got more important things to do than be having this conversation."

Charity was speechless. From her expression, he guessed that this morning didn't go how she had planned. "Jerk." She had muttered before climbing out of bed, putting on her skanky clothes from last night and leaving without saying another word. Damon simply did nothing, returning back to sleep for just a few more minutes which turned into a few more hours.

* * *

Sunday night, Elena and Jeremy decided to order in Chinese and watch the Hunger games.

"They've skipped over parts from the book already!" Elena huffed while stuffing an eggroll into her mouth.

"It seems good to me so far." Her brother shrugged back, paying more attention to his rice than the television screen.

"I would actually believe you if you were actually watching it! She claimed. "I had higher expectations of this movie, ugh." She groaned. "We have these images in our head of how the characters look, sound, seem and we have our own portrayal of thoughts for the environment and the setting. Movies completely ruin it, they don't do justice."

"Oh Elena" Jeremy laughed. "You've got to stop winding yourself up over silly little things like this. If you don't want to view books differently, don't watch the movies, it's quite simple."

"You can kiss my ass." His sister barked back. "You're too sarcastic for your own good sometimes."

Jeremy smirked before popping a fork full of rice into his mouth. "And that's why you love me 'Lena. Besides, you don't exactly have a choice in the matter do you?"

"Unfortunately not" Elena joked back.

"Oh be good." Jeremy insisted before finally focusing on the movie.

Elena tried to watch the rest of it, but found her eyelids getting heavy. Before drifting to sleep, her mind momentarily thought about her too sexy to be true, doctor. She wanted to get to know him for some profound reason. She wanted to break through his facade, and see the real man beneath-not the cold hearted monster he was showing, but a man. Seeing him at Bree's pub brought her new feelings, but also confusion. Yes, she was confused... how could she get to know a man that seemed ruthless and cold? She didn't know where to even begin because he clearly didn't want to be figured out, to be known. And how could she, Elena Gilbert, a young woman that had just begun battling for her life, change a person?

Elena sighed. She wasn't even sure of what to think anymore. Why was she actually caring? She had been having crushes since the age of thirteen, when she was just a teenager. This one is just another one; she added mentally, the only thing she was attracted to was his looks, obviously. But yet, there was something more… she didn't know what. She should let him live his life, after all. He was just her doctor...and an attraction that would quickly end.

But before her eyes closed to sleep, she could've sworn that something told her that the last few statements were not entirely true. That there was more that what lay on the surface, somewhere lay a depth that would eventually be known.

* * *

**A.N: I actually surprised myself by putting together this chapter during finals. I really wanted to update both of my stories at least once for you guys, this is the last update until around the 23th of June. I know it's starting off slow but I just want to lay everything down so there's absolutely no confusion :)**

**ALSO, a huge special thanks for my new best friend, Amy (LiveBreatheVampire) for beta-ing and helping me with this chapter, I love you girl! Everybody check her out, she's an amazing author :D **

**Have any input? Tell me what you think :) I'll incorporate your ideas if they'd go along with this story, I always love having chats :) **

**Remember to review :)**

**Thanks for reading everybody!**


	4. IV

IV.

* * *

It was Monday morning and he was still feeling a slight touch of the hangover he had gotten from Saturday night's activities. It was typical for him to have a two-day hangover although you'd think he would be accustomed to the alcohol by now. It was no secret that drinking was a recurring thing for him. He ignored the constant throbbing in his head thought because today was the day. Today was the day that he had an appointment scheduled with Ms. Elena Gilbert. God her name made her even sexier. He already had the entire appointment practically planned out. He had to take a few samples of her blood and just some other mandatory procedures that he did with every patient. It wasn't exactly the circumstances he would hope for to get to know somebody but he did it with all the other women and they seemed to like it. He toyed with their emotions when they were the weakest and most vulnerable, what better time to latch onto the perfect catch?

He began daydreaming about everything he could do to her and how he would do it. She didn't seem like the typical, wham bam thank you ma'am kind of girl so he probably wouldn't be able to seduce her with just his charm alone. A simple coffee would probably work best, considering it would take him a while to build her up. The coffee would grow to a café which would go to a dinner and then voila, anybody knows what happens after dinner. One too many drinks and an unforgettable lay.

He heard a knock on the door, the same knock he had heard a week from today. He started feeling giddy wondering what his eyes would rest upon when she opened that door.

"Come on in," Damon called. She opened the door and walked in just as graceful as if she were floating instead of walking. Her hair was softly curled today, and the curls bounced with each step she took. She was wearing a pink lipstick that made her lips look so full and welcoming as they curled up into a teeth-showing smile. Her make up was simple yet alluring, especially with those dazzling brown orbs. Not that she needed any make up, he sighed to himself.

She kept walking toward him—toward the chair he motioned her to sit in. He took no time to sex up the rest of her body with his eyes. They trailed down her long, slender neck towards her chest which was on display for him. She was modeling a sapphire blue lace blouse that had ruffles at the chest which dropped in the form of a sweetheart neckline. The shirt was tucked into black dress pants. Really tight dress pants. She looked astounding but he moved his eyes back to hers before she could notice what he was doing.

"Good morning Dr. Salvatore," She greeted whilst sitting down in the chair in front of him, placing the green jacket that was in her hands on the armrest of the chair.

"Good morning to you as well, Ms. Gilbert." He smirked.

"Oh please, call me Elena from now on." She insisted.

"Only if you call me Damon," He retorted.

"I think I can manage that." Perfect, they were on first name basis already.

Now it was her time to size him up, to be blunt. She quickly glanced at him from across the desk, only able to see from his waist up. His hair was neat but yet shaggy because of its length and it swept across his forehead in all the perfect ways to really accentuate his features. His eyes got her every time. Well the two times so far, she's been mesmerized by them. He was clean shaven, showing up his perfectly chiseled jaws which probably were his best feature. She looked lower to discover that he had nothing more than a simple navy button up shirt on but he had the very top button undone making the outfit so much sexier.

She begun contemplating telling him she had seen him at the pub but she decided against it, not wanting to sound like a stalker nor somebody interested in his life. She was of course, but why would she let him know that?

"Great," Damon finally said before clearing his throat. "How was your weekend?"

Elena was caught off guard when he started making small talk. "Um… it was fine." She said, trying to leave it at that.

"Yeah? What did you do?" He asked, pushing her further wanting to know.

"I worked for most of it. On Saturday I went out for a little bit and then on Sunday my brother and I ordered Chinese and watched a movie," She chuckled a little, whilst tucking a strand of hair behind her ear with her pinky capturing Damon's attention.

She looked so cute when she did that, it was almost like she was smirking although she seemed to be really nervous. Maybe that's what she did when she was nervous.

"Sounds like a typical weekend for you then," He stated.

"Sort of," She giggled. "I always work on weekends, and I'm always with my brother because he lives with me but I rarely go out."

"Why's that?" He asked, interested.

"I don't know," She shrugged. "I usually go to the bar by myself after work mostly just for a quick drink after work every now and then. I usually sit and chat with Bree but—" She cut herself off. Shit. She said Bree's name. He had to know that's the bar she had been at Saturday night. And he did, he caught on. As soon as she said that, his eyebrows shot up and he looked surprised.

"Really?" He asked. "I was at Bree's Saturday night and I didn't see you. If I had I would've came and had a drink with you." He smirked.

Elena wanted to say 'yeah well it would have been hard to notice me when you were too busy trying to get laid' but she bit her tongue and refrained from saying that because, well. He was her doctor after all, and that would be very inappropriate. Instead she attempted to make him feel bad.

"I was up at the front of the bar, talking to Bree the entire time. I was in plain sight the whole night," She laughed but it was sort of stern, she had spunk. He liked that.

"I'll have to be sure to keep an eye out for you the next time I'm there," He winked.

"Guess so," She said, seeming uninterested even though she was interested. "So… what exactly do you have planned for me today?"

"Well…" He began, flicking through her chart work. "I have to take your blood work again because a couple of samples need to be done for different tests and I just got to do some normal appointment stuff. Check your heart rate, breathing rate, temperature, etc etc. All fun stuff." Damon rolled his eyes but chucked ever so slightly. "It shouldn't take too long."

"That's a shame," Elena said, mentally kicking her ass as soon as she'd done so. What the hell did she just say that for? Now he was definitely going to think she was into him.

"Really Ms. Gilbert—I mean, Elena" He corrected kind of smirking because of her little statement. Clearly she hadn't meant to say that, it was only a matter of time. The Salvatore charm was working already. "Most of my patients are more than happy to hear that their appointment will be very short."

She was at a loss for words; she had absolutely no idea what to say. She tried to think of a way to twist it around, but ideas failed her. "This is one of the nicer hospitals I've been to..." That was probably the worst way she could have went with the conversation and it earned a snort from Damon. "What could possibly be funny about that?" She asked, folding her arms.

"You don't want your appointment to end because you like the hospital? Come on 'Lena, if you're going to lie at least you can attempt a better one than that. If it's me keeping you here, all you had to do was say so." He winked at her, causing her to turn the brightest shade of red. It was only a matter of time for a cocky remark to come out of his mouth and he knew that, he just thought it'd be later than this. Hopefully she wouldn't think too badly of him.

"Damon… Dr. Salvatore, you're my doctor. Even if that was keeping me here, it isn't allowed." She chucked, still very nervous.

"Maybe so." He leaned forward getting as close as he could to her while sitting behind his desk and whispered very quietly. "But that isn't going to stop me" He leaned back slowly, reading her face as her cheeks got brighter and her expression went from stern to sort of sexy.

"Oh Dr. Salvatore, you're a work of art." She said, smiling but rolling her eyes.

"Damon" He hissed. "I told you to call me Damon. I mean… Dr. Salvatore's too formal." He laughed.

"I could call you Dr. Space Cadet. That is after all your real name, isn't it?" Elena let out a sigh of relief. The awkward-tension-part of their conversation subsided and it was back to giggles and jokes.

"Yes, yes it is." He said proudly. "But, I much rather prefer Damon. It's sexier." Damn, he didn't let go very easily did he?

"Okay then, Damon," She purred the syllables off her tongue seductively trying to use some of the 'spark' she was told she had. If he was going to flirt with her, the least she could do was flirt back. "I'll call you Damon from now on, just stop hitting on me every five seconds."

His mouth shot open. "I'm offended," His hand flew to his chest. "I am not hitting on you Elena, god" He said that louder than he should have causing Elena to have a heart attack.

"For God sakes Damon, keep it down. Somebody might here you and get the wrong idea." She whispered viscously.

"That's the fun part..." He winked again.

"You're unbelievable…"

"I know." He said, not even getting her time to finish her sentence.

"Not in a good way!"

"Even better."

"Ugh." She groaned. "How about the tests? This appointment will end up being long if we don't get started."

He cleared his throat standing up. "Right. Follow me".

* * *

It was around quarter to eleven, their appointment had last a little over two hours which wasn't long considering all the 'normal procedures' Damon had to do. They took five little vials of blood from her, which scared her but Damon reassured her that everything would be fine once she got some food and drink into her. He took her to the canteen and bought her milk and biscuits, needing to feed her something with sugar and vitamins in it. They made small talk for the duration of her appointment; he hadn't made any more witty or flirty remarks which made Elena happy. She didn't know how to respond to him, her mind stopped working whenever he showed interest in her. But even though he didn't say anything, his eyes said it all. Little moments like the one where he was taking her pulse, he would stare at her so intensely with those eyes that it felt like he could see every nook and cranny of her soul and his eyes were screaming desire. That she could she but that she brushed off.

They were back in Damon's office now, and she was getting ready to leave, putting her coat back on.

"Let me take you for coffee," Damon insisted out of nowhere which actually really startled Elena. She didn't think he would go as far as asking a patient out. Sure some harmless flirting but this. Wow.

"I shouldn't." She said uneasily.

"Why not?" He asked. "It's just a coffee."

"It may be just a coffee, Damon," She smirked. "But it isn't allowed and quite frankly, I'm busy."

"But I didn't even tell you when," He shot his arms in the air before running his hands through his hair, which was now messier than normal.

"I'm always busy. Until next time, doc," She shrugged before turning on her heels and walking out the door leaving a rejected and shocked Damon. What the hell did just happen? Shocked and rejected? He had never experienced those two in his life!

Damon was speechless, not that his words would be heard anyway but that never happened. That was the very first time that a woman of any time had ever blown Damon off and it kind of hurt, if he would be honest. Rejection wasn't good but it wouldn't stay like this. No. Damon was going to try all he could now to get her attention. She was surely going to be worth it, she was probably just playing hard to get. But he would get her. It was only a matter of time.

* * *

As Elena pulled into her driveway she was still smirking, still pleased with herself for doing that. Of course she was going to say no! After what Bree had told her, she knew he was just after her for the sex. And who would she be to sleep with her oncologist? That's right… her cancer doctor. Although to be honest, she had truly forgot what her appointment was about. Damon made it so effortless, so carefree and so interesting. Their eye contact made her not able to think about anything else but him so it left her mind reeling, not able to think about the cancer but here she was. Walking into her apartment, thinking about her cancer. That didn't last for long though because she fell to the floor as she as she stepped inside, clutching her chest trying to regain her breath. What was happening? This was the first time it had ever happened. Elena wasn't able to catch her breath; it was like the wind was permanently knocked out of her. She managed a short wheezy huff and puff every few seconds but it wasn't enough. She crawled toward the kitchen, to retrieve an emergency puffer that she hoped would solve the problem. As she barely managed to stand up and grab it, she took three deep breaths with it, and it helped a little bit but her chest was still very tight and she could only breathe in about halfway.

She took a couple more breathes using the puffer but when it showed no help, she tossed it on the counter and reached for her phone, dialing the one person she counted on.

"Jer" She whispered.

"Elena, what's wrong?" He demanded.

"I can't breathe, Jer." She wheezed. "There's something really wrong."

"I'm on my way there right now, I'm at the supermarket." He ended the call abruptly. Elena was so thankful for her brother. Hopefully he would hurry.

After pouring herself a glass of water with very shaky hands, she attempted to make her way to the living room. Her breathe half back. But just about ten feet from the couch, it left again completely. Leaving her unable to do anything but inhale pointlessly. She came to a halt and remained like that for what seemed like minutes trying to breathe, her hands getting shakier and shakier by the second as her mind slowly began caving in, the blackness beginning to consume her. "No!" She whispered knowing full well what was about to happen but before she could think of anything else, she collapsed on the floor, passing out. The glass of water shattering beside her, its content going all over the floor.

She stopped breathing for a few seconds and then her lungs finally kicked in and began breathing while she was unconscious lying on the floor.

Jeremy rushed in five minutes later, glancing around before he seen her body motionless on the living room floor.

"Elena!" He cried, rushing over to her.

* * *

**AN/: Thanks for all of your attention towards this story, I'd like to personally thank each any every one of you :) I'm sorry for my late update but with exams and all it was nearly impossible to update. **

**Thanks to my beta LiveBreatheVampire, I was able to get this chapter up almost instantly. She's amazing, check out her stuff. **

**And remember, please review :) **


	5. V

V.

* * *

Elena started opening her eyes groggily to the sound of muffled voices. Her head was throbbing. She realized she was lying on some hard surface and when she looked around, it was not only confirmed that she was on the floor but she came face to face with her blue-eyed doctor. His eyes were filled with worry; there were no longer any traces of his smirk or his charm. He was strictly in doctor-mode.

"Elena, can you hear me? Elena, are you okay?" He asked, touching her forehead and then her cheeks with the back of his hand.

"Yes," She choked out. "What happened?" She asked before she started remembering. She lost her breath walking in her house and she called Jeremy, telling him to come over.

"You fainted by the looks of it," Damon stated. "I haven't been here very long nor have you been out very long. Your brother..." He gestured over towards Jeremy who was on the other side of Elena looking petrified. "… called me as soon as he found you."

"Jer, how did you know to call Da—I err… mean Dr. Salvatore?" Elena asked as she attempted to sit up, her voice was raspy.

"I looked through your wallet until I found his business card." The young brother shrugged. "I didn't know who else to call."

"You should have called an ambulance or something!" Elena exclaimed. "Dr. Salvatore's a very busy man-" But before she could say anymore, she was cut off by the doctor himself.

"An ambulance here in Toronto, Elena… seriously? It would have taken them at least ten more minutes than it took for me to get here. Honestly, I didn't mind… I wasn't even busy." He purposely forgot to mention that he had to get Andy to cancel three of his next appointments and reschedule them for later but that wasn't really any big deal. He could care less. She mattered, and he cared more about her safety than the other patients.

"Are you sure?" She asked, still not fully convinced.

"Yes" He insisted. "Now, I think it would be best for you to come back to the hospital with me. I have a couple assumptions regarding the cause of this incident but I'll get your blood work from this morning to get tested right away and we'll see what the problem actually is. Okay?" He asked, scanning her face. She didn't look worried for somebody whose symptoms might be worsening.

"I can't." Elena sighed. "I have work."

Damon snorted at her response. "You are seriously going to skip the hospital to see what is wrong with you so you can go to work?"

"My job is more important to me, it's my life." She said with pride.

"Oh so your job is more important than you body that just so happens to have cancer?" He asked quite bluntly causing Elena to shudder at his response. "And what is it that you do for a living again?"

"I am a CEO of a fashion company and right now I am in the middle of a very important winter collection." She stood up straighter than before and crossed her arms.

"Uh huh." Damon smirked, seeming to care less about her job. "Well sweetheart, the clothes can wait. Your health can't. You are coming to the hospital with me because we don't know how serious this is, Elena. Do you understand?" His eyes bored into hers, once again searching every inch of her face.

His eyes looked genuinely concerned and eager for her to trust him. There wasn't his usual smirk or grin; he just looked concerned and maybe even worried. She understood where he was coming from so she sighed and moaned. "Fine."

"I'm coming with you 'Lena." Jeremy insisted.

"No Jer,"

Elena hissed back. "You have school." Her voice softened. "I'll be fine, really. Dr. Salvatore will take care of me." She shot him a quick glance and he winked at her, hoping that her brother didn't see it.

"Are you sure?" He asked wearily.

"Yes, really. I'll be fine. What's the worst it could be?" She said smiling, trying to reassure her little brother and that's honestly what she thought as well. That everything was fine, but something deep inside the back of her mind warned her and somehow she found herself thinking _this is only the beginning. _She brushed away the thought and quickly added. "Call the office for me and tell Caroline where I am." Her brother nodded.

"Great." Damon clapped his hands together. "It's settled then, let's go."

* * *

"Well my assumption was right." Damon said while walking back into his office to Elena, holding her test results in hand.

"Okay…" Elena raised her eyebrows at him and sat up straighter. "What was it?"

"Well leukemia is greatly known for the destruction it does to your white blood cells but, it also harms your red blood cells, except not to as great of an extent." Damon said, trying to explain it as simply as he could for the untrained woman. "Your red blood cells carry oxygen from your lungs to the rest of your body and a shortage of these, causes lack of breath."

"So my red blood cell count is dropping?" She asked while shaking her legs.

"Well the average woman has anywhere from four to five million red blood cells per microlitre," He explained." Your test results are showing you to have approximately three million which would explain your shortage of breath."

"Is that bad?" She asked.

"Well it isn't good." He said. "Look what it did to you this morning. It shows us that your cancer is progressing at a steady pace."

Elena's heart dropped. She had only learned that last week she had leukemia and one week later she was told it was already progressing. She didn't know what to make of it. She didn't know whether to cry or not, but she decided against it and would wait until she got home, to stay strong in front of Damon. "But I only found out I had cancer last week. How can it be progressing already!" Her voice was uneasy and louder than normal. Damon seemed to ignore this though and continued to talk calmly to her, in fact; he talked sweeter than normal.

"We only discovered that you had leukemia last week, Elena. We do not know for certain how long you had it but it was longer than one week. We caught it at an early stage yes, but that doesn't mean much. It means that we caught it weeks, maybe a month or two into it instead of later on down the road."

"I know that but this is still so hard." She whined, and rightfully so. This was all still so new with her and she pretended to be taking it well but really, it was tearing her up. She didn't want to be sick, she couldn't be sick but here she was, being sick… not that she could help it of course. She was so young, so full of energy...She wanted to be able to grow older, to excel in her job and plan her future, maybe get married and have children...

"Hey" Damon whispered putting his hand on her shoulder and rubbing it ever so softly. "We'll get through this together, okay? This is my job; I'll have you healthy as a horse again before you know it." He said adding a true smile. He wanted her to be okay as cruel as he was. No matter how cold-hearted Damon Salvatore was, he was a doctor and his job and life was to save people. He could care less about those people but he did a damn good job in saving their lives.

Maybe the main reason he only wanted to keep her healthy and well was to jump her bones but she was a really nice woman and she was fun, exciting, and sexy. He would do what he could to keep her well—for him. The things he felt, the urge for this woman to get healthy couldn't be explained. Plainly, he wanted her to be healthy. Period.

Elena's eyes were glistening with the tears that were threatening to fall but she looked at him with her large eyes and smiled at his touch. "I believe you." She sniffed, and it was true, she did. She felt that he could be trusted. That he cared, in the weirdest way possible.

"Good," He whispered, seeming almost too caring so he snapped out of it and cleared his throat. He would have to make a mental note not to see so concerned next time.

"Yeah…" Elena said, the air suddenly becoming much tenser between them and it seemed almost awkward again. "I should really get going; I would like to work at least half a day today." She reached for her phone in her purse but before she could Damon spoke.

"What are you doing?" He said, a confused expression lodged upon his face.

"I'm calling a taxi." She replied.

"Nonsense, Elena." He said. "I drove you here, I'll drive you home." He said feeling obligated.

"That really isn't necessary, Damon." Elena warned him.

"It is, now stop complaining. How about that coffee before I drop you off?" He winked at her, yet again.

"You never quit do you?" She laughed, scratching the back of her head.

"Nope." He said popping the word.

"Next time." Elena promised but Damon's eyes stayed on hers. "Honestly. I just want to get to work. Caroline is going to flip."

Damon narrowed his eyes at her but ended up trusting her. "Fine, I'll hold to you that. Who is Caroline?"

"She's the other CEO and my best friend since like, ever."

"Is she hot?"

"Excuse me?" Elena deadpanned.

"Relax." Damon smirked. "I'm just kidding with you. Lighten up Gilbert."

Elena had to bite her tongue to stop her from speaking her mind which would have been something like 'no you're not kidding. You want to know how attractive my best friend is because you want to screw her, like you screw everything else.' But of course, she couldn't say that to her doctor's face and surprisingly, he had been a tremendous help today and he helped her cope with things rather well… given the circumstances.

"Sure." Elena snickered but she smiled trying to make her dead serious comment sound playful.

* * *

"This is me." She said as Damon slowed into her apartment complex.

"I know. I was already here, remember?" He teased.

"Right." She forgot for a moment. "I'm sorry."

"Don't sweat it."

Elena unbuckled her seatbelt, opened the door and attempted to step out of the car but a firm hand grasped her shoulder.

"I think you should come by the office tomorrow or Wednesday, you know? Just for precautions and so I can figure out what to do with you." Damon said.

"What do you mean?" Elena asked,

"We need to figure out when to start your chemotherapy, Elena." He answered.

"Oh..."

She whispered and then sternness over come her. The word chemotherapy felt like a dagger was pressed into her heart. Fatigue, hair loss...She shrugged at the thought and tried to remain calm as possible.

"Well just to be clear, I am not taking anymore time off work, I've already missed a full day in the last two weeks because of you."

"Because of me?" Damon pointed at himself pretending to be offended. "It's because of your health, darling." He reminded her.

"Yeah, but you still made the appointments." She retorted.

"Yeah, only because I can and because I have to." He reminded her again.

"Yeah, _right."_Elena said, her voice dripping with sarcasm. "Well I normally get off at five, unless I'm running late. What time does your clinic close?"

"Five as well." He told her. "But I'll make an exception for you. Swing by the office after work and I'll be there."

She gulped, suddenly feeling giddy and uncomfortable. He was going to stay at work

longer than he had to for her, and he wasn't even going to get paid. That had to mean something right? No. Elena shrugged the thoughts away before they could really sink in. He was a womanizer with a lot of money trying to lure in women such as herself and it seems to have worked in the past but not with her, not with Elena Gilbert. She was a strong, successful and independent woman and she would not fall for some man slut regardless if he was her doctor or not.

"Sounds good." She simply said, trying not to realize what he just did.

His hand that was resting on her shoulder now finally came off as he grasped the steering wheel with two firm hands. "Great" Damon concluded. "So I guess I will see you tomorrow Elena."

"Good night Damon." She said before closing the passenger door and heading toward the main entrance of her building but before she did, she looked back to watch Damon drive away. He confused her more and more. Sweet one minute, alluring the next. She couldn't understand him, and no matter how much she tried to get used to him, Salvatore never failed to surprise her.

* * *

The next day at work was a pretty shitty one. Elena did what she had to do; she arranged the rest of the magazine and prepped it for production and all that so she ended up having some free time to herself. Unfortunately, she just found herself thinking about her diagnosis and how much time she had left. And to be honest, it put her in a pretty dreary mood. Work had lifted her spirits for the past week but not today. No. Today she couldn't get her mind off the attack that happened yesterday or the words that Damon had told her. _Your cancer is progressing at a steady pace_kept ringing in her ears, messing with her brain.

For the remainder of the day, awaiting her appointment with Damon she moped around, well not really because she hardly left her desk. She doodled new articles of clothing, sketched new ideas, and arranged different pieces but even after a while; that became boring and she was no longer interesting in doing anything work related. She sat at her desk, leaned over it with her hand propped on her cheek leaning over and staring at the blank piece of paper before her. In her free hand was a typical pencil, which she twisted and twirled around out of boredom.

And suddenly, Elena found herself thinking about her life and all the things she had—no, hadn't done yet. She hadn't travelled the world like she had planned, she hadn't done this she hadn't done that. All of a sudden, an idea popped into her head and she began scribbling down ideas furiously upon that white piece of paper. Things that she wanted to do before she died, before she 'kicked the bucket' so to speak and at the top of the page, she simply scribbled the words _Last Wishes._

Written upon that sheet of paper were seven things, her seven wishes. The most important things she wanted to do before she died and neither were completed before.

She sighed to herself before reading them aloud. "These are my last wishes. This is what I want to do before I die.

_#1. Go on an African safari._

_#2. Camp out under the stars._

_#3. Go to an all-you-can-eat-buffet and eat until I puke._

_#4. Fall in love, unconditionally and recklessly._

_#5. Have sex in the bathroom of an airplane._

_#6. See Metallica live._

_#7. Parasail._

She read the words over and over, contemplating just how realistic she was. There were a few that would be no trouble because all it required was money, which Elena had a bountiful amount of. But then some of them were nearly impossible to do in her amount of time such as numbers four and five. Elena snorted at herself thinking about numbers four and five. Have sex in an airplane and fall in love. Those were highly unlikely. She hadn't even been interesting in anybody since her college boyfriend Matt and it's been a good many years since that. He was perfect, sweet, cute, and funny and charming… all the qualities of somebody she was looking for but yet, he didn't cut it. She wanted more… he lacked something; she just couldn't put her finger on it. That was like all the other guys that were interested in her over the years but none of them were what she wanted. None of them were what she needed to find a companion… her doctor was enthralling but that was just it. He was her doctor and it wouldn't go any farther than that. Plus, not to mention the fact he was a whore and an apparent cocky ass most of the time but he wasn't like that with her. He was sweet, gentle but distant. She wondered why. Maybe he got his heart broken? Maybe his girlfriend cheated on him? Maybe he had lost somebody other than that peculiar little girl that was the cause of his coldness.

She groaned to herself out loud shaking away the thoughts of love and companions and soul mates and all that jazz and decided that she was being absurd and unrealistic in making that list. She wouldn't even have anybody to do it with her… well the things besides four and five like parasail, etc so she crumbled up the piece of paper and was about to throw it in her waste basket but realized it was full. She didn't want it to be possibly seen by anybody else especially Caroline because they—she would ask questions that Elena wasn't really ready to answer just yet so she placed the paper ball of nothing into her purse, pursuing to throw it away when she got back home.

* * *

After a boring, half-successful day of work, Elena was finally standing outside Doctor Salvatore/Damon's office. She would much rather be home but she promised him she would stop by so she unfortunately, had no other choice.

She took a deep breath and knocked on his door but it was already slightly ajar when she did so it just opened even more.

"Come in, Elena," Damon called out to her, his found sounding tired but still enthusiastic.

"Good day, Damon," Elena greeted walking into his office, removing her jacket and placing her purse in her lap as she sat across from him in her usual spot.

"Hello, Elena." He said. "How was work?"

"Work was work." Elena stated.

This earned a raised eyebrow from Damon. "I thought you loved your work?"

"I do…" She started. "…but-"

"But what?" He asked, getting on the edge of his seat and leaning closer to her. He remained silent for a moment waiting but then cleared his throat and backed away. "I'm sorry to cut you off and question you, that was rather rude of me."

"It's fine." Elena reassured. "But I don't know… I just had a lot on my mind today and I just guess I didn't want to be there."

"What was on your mind, if you don't mind me asking?" Damon questioned, seeming concerned.

"This whole situation." She answered looking away. "It just… scares me, you know?"

"Yeah, I know." _And I understand__,_he added mentally. He couldn't be compassionate though. This girl was already melting his cold heart.

Elena took in his words, her eyes finding a picture of a pretty little girl with blonde hair. "Who's that?" She pointed. "A relative?"

"No" Damon muttered. "A patient."

"Forgive me for sounding blunt… but, she must have been some patient to earn a place on your desk."

"She _was."_Damon answered coldly, not really wanting to discuss it any further.

"Was?" Elena asked.

"Yeah, she was my first child patient… Elena. I would rather we not talk about this right now, perhaps a tale for another time."

Damon ended the subject with no intention of it ever being told at a later time.

"Okay then…" Elena trailed off, clearly noticing his coldness towards the subject but that didn't stop her from remaining curious.

"Back to business." Damon attempted to change the subject. "I think we should start on chemotherapy as soon as possible, to catch it before the symptoms really start to progress."

"How soon?" She asked wearily.

"Next week? Two at the most, I don't want to wait any longer, Elena. We're taking a big risk each day that we choose to ignore the matter."

She sighed. "I suppose you're right. Next week is fine."

"Great." Damon muttered, not concentrated on her words but on the pen and files that were before him. He started writing on her files, probably adding in that she would be starting her chemo soon. "Alright." He concluded and shut the files. "I have you scheduled in for your first chemotherapy treatment one week from today, same time as this morning, is that fine?"

"Yeah" She muttered. "What's it like?"

"It's a harsh therapy, Elena… I'm not going to lie to you." And why would he? He couldn't simply say it would be a breeze and would heel her right away, no. "But I'll be there for every appointment—every treatment, I'll be right by your side." He said, reassuring her and gave her a quick smile.

"Thank you, Damon." Elena smiled back coyly.

But the asshole of a Damon that didn't want to be nice lurked its way out because of how mushy he was acting lately. "Don't thank me. I do it because I get paid."

Elena didn't know what to say to that, she was stunned how he could change moods so quickly. Perhaps he was bi-polar? Maybe. He noticed her lack of facial expression and realized that was too harsh. "How about that coffee you promised?"

"Now?" Elena asked, still feeling whiplash from his yet again, change in demeanor. How could he even do that? Turn from sweet to a complete asshole in less than five seconds?

"Why not? You're not working, I'm not working, and I think it's the perfect time."

"Okay then." She murmured, not interested the slightest bit. She wanted to get this done and out of the way having to deal with it now rather than later and her lack of interest was irritating Damon quite a bit.

"Great." Damon chose to ignore her. "You take your car; I'll take mine so that way… when we're finished we can both go home straight from there."

"Gotcha." Elena gave him thumbs up.

"We will meet at the Tim Horton's there just a block away, okay?"

"Yep." Elena said popping the P.

* * *

"Boston cream doughnut and a medium ice cap?" Damon questioned, actually quite surprised. "Most women your age wouldn't be caught dead drinking or eating that."

"And why the hell not?" Elena barked back, biting into her delicious pastry.

"Because it's calories, Elena. It's all about the calories when you're a woman isn't it?"

"Only for women with low metabolisms that have to work their asses off for a body like this." Elena said boastingly but also jokingly trying to lighten the mood. "I was lucky enough to inherit my father's metabolism so I can eat this…" She took another bite of her doughnut smearing the cream over her lips which was a very hot sight for Damon; and took a big sip of her ice cap to prove her point "…without feeling shitty afterword." She smirked, knowing that wasn't the response he was hoping. Instead he just laughed slightly.

"You surprise me more and more, Elena." Damon whispered a little too seductively. But before she had the chance to reply, her phone started singing 'Holiday in Cambodia' signaling it was Jeremy. Shit. She had forgotten to call and clue him in. She placed her purse on the table digging through it frantically before retrieving her phone and knocking out a crumbled piece of paper in the process.

"I didn't take you as a punk listener kind of girl." Damon smirked while Elena picked up the phone, giving her once again, no time to respond to his comment.

"Hey, Jer?" Elena said. "Yeah everything's fine. I'm scheduled for my first chemotherapy next week… No. You won't be able to make it, you're going to be in school it's an early appointment…Yeah, I'm sure…"

Damon's thoughts went on that piece of paper that had fallen on the floor. He bent over to pick it up and began to open it, curiosity getting the best of him.

"No, Damon. Don't." Elena warned

He ignored her of course and smirked. "Why, is it a romance letter from a lover?" He teased. He instead came in contact with some kind of list. He read it out loud.

_Last Wishes.._

_#1. Go on an African safari._

_#2. Camp out under the stars._

_#3. Go to an all-you-can-eat-buffet and eat until I puke._

_#4. Fall in love, unconditionally and recklessly._

_#5. Have sex in the bathroom of an airplane._

_#6. See Metallica live._

_#7. Parasail._

"Jer, I'll call you back." She said angrily to her brother on the phone and not waiting for a response, ended the call before turning her attention back to Damon. "What the hell? I told you not to open it."

"Elena… what is this?" Damon asked once again, reading each number over carefully, suddenly very intrigued.

"It's what I want to do… before I die. I was bored at work yesterday and just started doodling, it's nothing."

"If it were nothing, you wouldn't have kept it." Damon retorted.

"Yeah but-" She tried to come back.

"No, Elena, this is ridiculous. You can't go thinking like this yet."

He told her. "You are young, you are strong, you'll pull through this, for God's sake do not give up yet." He pled.

"It was just a thought." She answered falsely. It was more than a thought.

Damon didn't say anything; he just glanced from her to the paper and back to her again. A few in particular caught his attention, especially the sex in an airplane one. That would he would definitely be able to help her with; he suddenly had a brilliant idea. But his mind couldn't help glancing at number four and wishing, if only a little bit that that could be him. That he could fall in love and not be lonely, if she could fall in love with him and fill the hole in his heart, his forever aching heart. But he knew better than that. He was in the process of pushing her away, and it seemed to be working but that didn't stop him for thinking—hoping—wishing. But something as immense as this was too much to wish for.

Love...did he even deserve love? Would he be able to love a woman and stay with just one woman? He didn't know. Too many things happened in his life. Sometimes he thought that he was immune to love.

But looking at the young brunette in front of him, his heart swelled. No, he wouldn't let anything happen to Elena. He was going to help her through this. For both their sakes.

* * *

A/N: I hope this was worth the wait. I'm sorry, I told a few of you in PM that I would have had this up 3+days ago and for that I'm sorry. We ended up getting beautiful weather here in NL, for once... so I was hardly indoors and whenever I was, I was writing but as you can probably tell... this is my longest chapter for any story, ever! So I hope you like. :)

This will probably be the last update for a little over a week, I'm going to PEI Thursday morning for one week and I doubt I will have time to write but don't worry, I'll update as soon as I get back :D

_Thanks to Amy, LiveBreatheVampire for revising and betaing for me every chapter, every story. You're amazing girl and I wouldn't be able to do this without you. Seriously, check out her stories she's unbelievable. _

_**Don't forget to review, please :) **  
_


	6. VI

_VI_

* * *

It had been a week since Elena last spoke to Damon. Was she avoiding him? No. Okay, maybe a little but that was only because he read her list. The list she hadn't intended on having anybody see but he didn't listen to her and read it anyway. She felt dumb for thinking of those things after he yelled at her for it. But he didn't know what it was like! She didn't know if she was going to live or die, when or where. For all she knew she had a week left. She could have years left, nobody could tell, not this early into it. It was only a thought but Elena thought about it more and more over the course of the week and decided not to let Damon's words get to her. She was going to complete the list, whether it be by herself or with a friend but she was doing it. If not for her dying wish, then for fun. She couldn't remember the last time she truly had fun.

Elena stopped by Tim Horton's on the way to work to grab her usual coffee. The line was usually long but this time it was lengthier than usual so she decided to find a parking spot and go inside to get her coffee and just be on her way.

Once in the line up, she noticed there were only two other guys on ahead of her so she began rummaging through her purse to retrieve her wallet only dropping it in the process.

Before she had the chance to pick it up, the guy in front of her turned around and did it himself, passing it to her and smiling. He was dashing. Wow, he was extremely good looking. He had golden hair that was styled slightly, green eyes, chiseled features, and an amazing smile. He was wearing a simple suit, which indicated to Elena right away that he was some kind of business man. "Oh here you go," He smiled handing her her wallet.

She took it from him smiling and probably blushing because she could feel her cheeks on fire. "Thank you."

"You're welcome—" He says, waiting to catch her name.

"Elena," She tells him. "My name's Elena Gilbert."

He offers his hand and she takes it happily, shaking it. "I'm Stefan." He says. "Stefan Salvatore." Salvatore? Wait, what? As in, Damon Salvatore?

"Salvatore?" She asks, slightly confused.

"Yes…" He trails off. "Why do you ask it like that?" He laughed.

"No reason…" She replies. "It's just, my doctors is Mr. Damon Salvatore."

"Ah, Damon" Stefan rolled his eyes, Elena failing to notice. "I see you have met my older brother."

"It would seem so." Elena laughed.

"He's your doctor? But he's an oncologist." Stefan asked wearily.

"Yeah… I know." Elena says, not knowing what else to say. She didn't want to just straight up tell this devilishly handsome stranger that she had cancer and she was being treated but his hot brother. Most of all, she didn't want to tell him that she was fighting for her life.

"Excuse me, sir. What can I get for you?" The lady behind the counter asked, probably for the third or fourth time.

Stefan looked back to Elena holding up his finger, she nodded as he ordered his morning coffee and bagel. Then Elena ordered her coffee and Stefan was waiting next to the counter for her.

"Any way, about what we were discussing before" Stefan says. "Don't say any more. Tell me tonight, at dinner." He smiled making Elena's heart race and the blood rush to her face again. Did she just get asked out on a date?

"Okay," Elena whispered shyly, tucking the loose strand of hair that fell behind her ear.

"How does eight sound?" Stefan asked walking her to her car, Elena leading the way obviously.

"Eight sounds wonderful," Elena told him.

"Great!" Stefan smiled once again; wow he sure was a happy guy or was it just because of her? Hopefully the latter idea, looks like she was going to find out.

"I can pick you up if you would like?" He offered.

"That would be great." Elena replied happily. "I live just over there, on the corner of Jane in the first white apartment building." She told him.

"Oh I know where that is," Stefan said, more to himself. "I guess I'll see you at eight?"

"I guess so" Elena blushed, for the third time before getting in her car, smiling and waving to Stefan as he walked toward his car and driving to work.

So many thoughts flooded through Elena's head. For starters, she was going on a date. Really going on a date, a date that wasn't set up by Caroline or Bonnie, her other best friend. Those two had been nagging Elena constantly over the last couple years urging her to put herself out there and every couple months they would have her set up on a blind date with some stranger she didn't want to be having dinner with. Some were nice, most were but they weren't for her. None of them were but this Stefan guy who just might be Damon's brother… she felt some kind of magnetic pull. Something had told her to go for it, and so she did, hoping she had made the right choice but also thinking she did. And then she started thinking of more serious topics like Damon and what he would think if later down the road Stefan introduced her to him, as his girlfriend. Would Damon find it weird? Would he be happy for them? Sure, she found her doctor attractive and knew there was something there but really? He was her doctor and that's all he was ever going to be. He was the party type. The fuck and chuck type of guy. The one everybody wanted and the one everybody could have but the one nobody could keep. Elena didn't want to get hung up over some lost cause and it was just as well for her to face it this early into it and focus more on other things, like Stefan. He seemed really nice. So far he was helpful, handsome, charming, nice, polite and sweet. Those were all great qualities and he didn't seem like Damon. Damon would not have asked a woman to dinner. Sure, he had asked her to coffee but that was different. He would ask a girl to a bar, get her drunk and take her home. No scratch that, he wouldn't even ask a woman to a bar because he was that cocky that he would go to Bree's; alone and find some woman there willing to give herself to him within an hour of his arrival, probably less. Stefan seemed the type of guy that would try to make a relationship work. Even though Damon was attractive, she didn't think that she'd have a future with him. Scratch that-If she even was going to have a future.

So that was that, Elena was really doing this, she was really going on her first date in a very long time that had been set up herself face to face with the person and it was exciting.

* * *

"You're what?" Caroline screamed, jumping with joy.

"I'm going to dinner tonight, with a guy I met this morning at Tim Horton's," Elena repeated, feeling giddy to her best friend's bubbly reaction.

"Who is he? What does he look like? Is he hot? Oh my god." Caroline babbled, throwing her hands in the air, her large smile never leaving that pale face.

"His name is Stefan Salvatore. He's very handsome, Caroline calm down!" Elena laughed at her friend.

"Do not tell me to calm down, Elena" Caroline warned her. "You are going on a much needed date tonight and me or Bon didn't even need to set it up!"

"I guess I can be my own matchmaker." Elena shrugged jokingly.

"Now let's be serious," Caroline's features dropped. "What are you going to wear? Where is he taking you? Are you wearing heels? You're wearing heels, right? How are you going to do your hair?"

"Whoah, whoah, whoah," Elena held out her hands. "Caroline, please calm down. If I didn't know better, I would think you were more excited than me about this dinner."

"It's not just a_dinner,_ Elena" The blonde corrected her. It's a date. And you need to know these things, in advance. God, if I were you I would not have even came into work today."

"Oh my Caroline, you're not being serious. I need to be here." Elena tells her.

"Yeah, but you need to be getting ready more! The catalogue can wait. You're almost done, aren't you?" She asked.

"Well it's finished but—" Elena began.

"But nothing. You should be hoping sleeping, working out, going out and buying new clothes with me," Caroline cut her off, sounding more serious than not.

"I am not buying new clothes for one date." Was all Elena replied to.

"Well you should," Caroline simply says. "You are not like me or Bonnie that's for sure."

"And what's that suppose to mean?" Elena laughed.

"You know exactly what that means Elena Gilbert!" Caroline laughed back.

"Well I hate to burst your little bubble," Elena says, drawing an imaginary bubble around her friend and popping it. "But I am staying here, until five. Then and only then, will I go home, shower and get ready for dinner!

"Date!" Caroline squeals. "It's a date!"

"Whatever," Elena winks at her best friend.

"You are going to be the death of me, Elena." She told her. "I am coming straight to your house after work. I am sitting on your bed while you shower and when you get out I am taking control. I do not trust you alone." She says, crossing her arms. "God, Elena, there is nothing wrong in looking sexy."

"You're going to pamper me?" Elena asked, amused.

"Yes. Think of it as a makeover." Caroline smiles. "A free makeover."

Elena wanted to protest but knew it was no use. Once Caroline thought something, there was no talking her out of it.

"Sounds good," Elena smiled, trying to make it seem as real as possible. "So are you going to get a ride with me then?"

"Yes," Caroline says. "Tyler dropped me off this morning because he needed the car." Tyler Lockwood was Caroline's boyfriend. He was nice, sweet and he treated her really well so Elena liked him.

"Okay. Well I'll be in my office if you need me," Elena tells her best friend, walking out of her office, across the hall and into her own not waiting for a reply. Caroline would have her kept there all day discussing her upcoming date if she didn't leave when she did.

* * *

Damon hadn't seen Elena for a week and it bothered him, for some reason. He knew it shouldn't but it did. He tried to distract himself in his work but on breaks, in between patients, he always found his mind wandering back to her and to her list. Maybe that had been the reason she hadn't talked to him in a week, because of the way he lashed out at her when he discovered her 'last wishes'. He shouldn't have yelled, but what he said was the truth. She shouldn't be thinking about death at this age, this early into her cancer. For all they knew she would recover miraculously but yet, there still seemed to be a part of her that doubted her life, or the length of it. But who was Damon kidding? He lied to himself saying that was the reason they hadn't talked but in reality, she had no reason to. She had no other appointment; she had no concerns or questions. He was her doctor and he was only supposed to be there for her, health regarding. But he couldn't shake the feeling that he wanted to be there for her more somehow. She was different; she wasn't like any other patient. She wasn't like any other woman for that matter. He had contemplated over the week asking her to dinner, to get ice cream; anything not business related but he would stare at the phone; unable to call her. And the main reason for that was Katherine, his ex-fiancée. He hadn't seen nor spoken to her since he called off the engagement, a little over six years ago. He was young and foolish and thought too much of love. She was the reason Damon Salvatore brushed aside feelings, caring and everything in between. He had been a student at the time, on his last year and they were sharing an apartment. He arrived home from school around dinner time, having a surprise exam that went pass the normal schedule hours. When he got home, he had seen clothes strewn upon the floor, leading up to the only bedroom in their apartment. Katherine had been cheating on him and it was only now he was catching her. And the beauty part about it was, the other male was his own brother, Stefan. Damon didn't say a word. He just turned on his heels and walked out, not talking to Stefan or Katherine since. Word gets around, of course and a couple months later Katherine broke it off with Stefan. But still, Damon didn't talk to his brother. Stefan tried to re-enter his older brother's life but failed miserably. Damon shut everybody out, especially him. Basically, his brother and Katherine ruined him and made him an emotion-less monster. And that's why he was so scared of Elena sometimes, because whenever he looked into her doe eyes something in him just changed. She was bringing out feelings in him which died a long time ago.

But his brother's betrayal with Katherine was the reason why Damon was afraid to get committed to a woman, to fall in love again. He felt love—and it sucked… it caused you to care about people who were only promising to eventually break your heart.

That's when the drinking and the women started. Not as bad at first because he needed to become a doctor, but once he had his PHD and a promising job, his consumption became more and more and although he had it under control, it was still too much; even today.

And then there was the other reason. Lily Demi Salvatore. Yeah, Damon's niece. She had been named after him and all, despite his hatred toward their parents. It would seem that sometime within the duration Katherine had been sleeping with Stefan behind Damon's back, Stefan had gotten Katherine pregnant.

It had been over a year since Damon had last spoken to Stefan or Katherine and that day Damon was interning, he walked into his assigned doctor's office to come face to face with his brother and his ex-fiancée. Neither of them knew that Damon would be there and when he saw them, he honestly didn't know what to make of it. To see that they had a little girl that was ill. At first he called it karma for ruining his life and going behind his back like that but that thought quickly exited his mind when he spent time with little Lily. She had quickly found a way into his heart and just like that, her treatment failed and she died on him, leaving Damon with a broken heart once again. She was the key to the mystery. She was the one that completed his transition. That was all he needed to fully become cold. He missed Lily, she had made him feel alive, and maybe the love the little girl offered him, overwhelmed the hate in Stefan and Katherine for him.

What was the point? He would always ask himself. He had loved, twice and both times getting crushed in the process. It wasn't worth it.

And that's when Damon realized. He needed to let Elena in. For his own sake, for his humanity. There was nobody else out there, not even Katherine that made Damon question his actions like Elena did. It confused the fuck out of him but he knew she was it. She was the key this time. She was his answer to getting his life back on track. He needed to ask her on a proper date, just to see what this truly was. He called her cell phone which had gone straight to voice mail. Great, he'd have to leave her a message then, which he did. Now all he had to do was wait.

God what was he getting himself into?

* * *

"Jeremy, be good!" Elena whined at her brother for 'making fun' of her going on a date.

"What?" He laughed. "It's been so long since you've put yourself out there. I thought you'd need a hip replacement before you went on another date,"

"Ha ha, you're hilarious" His sister rolled her eyes while looking out the window, waiting for Stefan.

"A true comedian," Jeremy agreed. "But seriously, it's about time 'Lena."

"I know," She sighed. "He seems really sweet, Jer… I hope something good comes out of this."

"Me too." He smiled at his sister. "And for his sake, he better be sweet or he's going to have to deal with me," Jeremy lifted up his fists punching the air to prove his point earning a hard laugh from Elena.

"Jer! You wouldn't hurt a fly." Elena said. "Let alone a man probably five-six years older than you"

"But I'd try, for you," He promised. "I'll always have your back sis."

"I know," Elena said, hugging her little brother. "That's why I love you,"

"I love you too." He hugged her back tightly, proving what he had just said. Even though he was younger than her, he was fiercely protective of his older sister, and the fact that she had cancer was devastating him, killing him from inside out. But for her sake, he tried to act normal.

"Crap!" Elena exclaimed. "He's down there. I've got to run. I'll see you soon okay! Bye!" She ran through the apartment door hopping into Stefan's car and driving off into the sunset.

* * *

"You look beautiful tonight, Elena," Stefan told her as she removed her coat, and placing it on the back of her chair at the elegant five-star restaurant that he had taken her to. She had picked out—no, Caroline had picked out a navy and white floral top and a matching black pencil skirt accompanied with white wedge heels. Caroline had curled her hair, pinned it to the side. Nothing too over the top but it was Caroline approved so it was fancier than Elena's usual attire.

"Thank you," Elena smiled, blushing. "I can't seem to stop blushing around you,"

"That isn't a bad thing, you know." He told her, smiling.

"Maybe not." She whispered back.

* * *

The date overall had been a success. Elena and Stefan had a delicious dinner and a lovely evening. They learned about each other's career and he loved and was committed to his job just as much as she was. He was a lawyer, working on a pretty large case at the moment he told her. They chatted about random things however not once did he bring up Damon and Elena wondered why. She had mentioned Jeremy.

He had taken her home, walked her to her door, asked for her number and to see her again which she accepted. And he had kissed her goodnight and it had felt good.

"How was it?" Jeremy called out from the couch, tilting his head over the side of it looking at her upside down.

"It was great!" Elena told him, a huge smile on her face.

"Are you going to see him again?" Jeremy asked.

"Yeah," Elena whispered. "I think I am."

"Well that's great 'Lena! I'm happy for you." He smiled upside down causing his cheeks to droop making Elena giggle.

"I'm going to call it a night though. Love you Jer." Elena blew her brother a kiss and he caught it.

"Love you more."

Elena made her way to her room like a goofy teenager, undressing and getting ready for bed. When the lights were off and she was alone with her thoughts, she decided to look at her phone realizing she hadn't checked it since Caroline had come over. One text from Caroline and one voicemail.

She glanced at the text message and laughed to herself. _Girl, you better have a good story for me tomorrow morning! I'm dying over here._

And then she played the voicemail, extremely surprised when she found herself listening to her doctor's husky voice.

_Hello Elena… It's Damon. I know we haven't talked in a week, there's no reason for us to but I feel like there should be… I'm really sorry for the way I got on at Tim Horton's when I read your list. It was horrible of me to judge you… I just…"_He sighed into the telephone. "_I hate seeing people; especially you give up this early into it. You're still strong; you've only had one bad symptom yet so don't fret okay? I'm going to fix you. But this isn't the main reason I'm calling… I have something important to ask you, not regarding anything to do with your health so don't worry. Just, text this number whenever you hear this, okay? Bye."_Elena was stunned. He had seemed so nervous toward the end, and it made her nervous so she decided to text him as quickly as possible.

_Hey, what did you want?_ No more than two minutes later she had a reply.

_Hey. I was hoping you'd call but this will have to do._ What was that supposed to mean? Before she had the chance to ask, she received another text message. _I was wondering if you wanted to grab a bite to eat sometime. _Oh no. No, this couldn't be happening…

All she could manager to type back was one single word. _Why?_

_I didn't know that when people asked you on a date, you needed an explanation _came his reply.

_I don't. It's just… you're my doctor, Damon._ Elena typed, thankful that she didn't call him. She was a mess right now.

_So? I haven't asked anybody this in over five years, Elena and to be honest… I don't know why I am now. There's something different about you, something I want to explore. Give me a chance. Just dinner, okay?_

Elena didn't know what to say to that. He was an ass! She had just went on a date with his brother but yet, if he had asked her this three hours before, she probably would have accepted, knowing full well of his playboy behavior. _Damon, there's something you should probably know first._

_Don't tell me. Tell me tomorrow night at dinner. After work, seven thirty_, _Swiss Chalet._ She knew how he was, he wasn't going to take no for an answer. She was about to text him and tell him anyway, but she thought better of it. She knew Damon; she didn't want to tell him on a phone.

_I don't know Damon…_She had written. This was a bad idea, very bad. For so many reasons. He was her doctor, for God's sake! And she had just went on a date, and kissed, for the record-his brother.

_Please, Elena? Just give this a chance._

_Okay, I guess._And she hit send. She had a bad feeling about this.

_Great! I'll see you tomorrow night then. Goodnight, Elena._

_Goodnight Damon._Elena replied, and for some reason she was excited. She didn't know why. She was obviously going to have to tell him about Stefan sometime that night and the uneasiness set back in.

What was she getting herself into?

What would that make her, going out with two brothers in two days? And what about her feelings? She was obviously attracted to Damon and Stefan came in the picture in the wrong time. But at the same time, Damon seemed old, maybe even unable to love. She was one of those people who actually wanted to be loved back. It wasn't too much to ask for, right?

What troubled her was why Stefan or Damon didn't even mention their brother. Sibling rivalry was the last thing she needed. She could feel herself entering into a big mess already, and she hadn't even gone to the 'date' yet.

She sighed in frustration and threw herself on the bed, deciding to get some sleep to clear her spinning head.

* * *

A/N: Thanks to my Beta and friend, Amy for helping me out this chapter. She's wonderful :)

Sorry for the long wait, I was in Prince Edward Island for a week and when I got back I needed to update my other story but here I am. Hope you liked it, let me know :)


	7. VII

_VII._

* * *

"I'm so happy to see you," Damon greeted her when Elena gracefully walked over to his table.

"You too," Elena forced a small smile. Her stomach was twisting painfully with all the butterflies. She was scared and ashamed, dating two brothers in a span of two nights wasn't her plan.

"Did I mention how lovely you looked this evening?" It made her blush as she tucked the loose tendril of hair behind her hair with her pinky finger.

She hadn't intended on going too over the top with her outfit not wanting to give him mixed signals but she still found herself dressing up more than usual. For some reason she always wanted to look acceptable—presentable around him. So she was wearing a gray pencil skirt with a v-neck, white lace blouse tucked into it. Her hair remained straight and flowed down to the middle of her back, long, luscious and luminous. And wanting to keep the 'au naturel' look, she settled with her nude lipstick accompanied with a light blush and her routine mascara and eyeliner to accentuate her large eyes. Her eyeshadow was also very simple and therefore it enhanced Elena's natural beauty.

"Thank you," Elena whispered. "You look… nice, as well." _As always_. She added mentally.

"Thanks," He said teasingly. "I'm truly flattered."

"Good evening Mr. Salvatore and Miss…-"The waitress interrupted their conversation to greet them. Although not so much Elena, her eyes were on Damon the whole time; sparkling and twinkling as she blushed a bright rose color. They knew each other, great. She sighed, a bit saddened by the thought. It was to be expected, though. She wondered if there was a woman in town that Damon didn't screw.

"Gilbert," Elena informed her, tipping her head to the side and smiled fictitiously, trying to hide her jealousy and sudden possessiveness.

"Pleasure," The waitress chimed, much too sarcastic. Damon raised an eyebrow in her direction causing her eyes to widen as she cleared her throat. "Uh, what can I start you two off with? Something to drink perhaps?" The elder waitress asked Damon in particular. She was sexing him with her eyes now, batting her lashes; making it obvious that she was ogling him. An unsettling feeling stirred in Elena's stomach and as much as she hated to admit it; it had to be jealously. She was jealous that they clearly had a past and knew each other. She was positive that it was more than a one night stand, maybe she was a regular? She scoffed. This man was not letting her think properly.

The waitress was probably early to mid-forties, had medium length brown hair. She was a pretty woman for her age. Elena's inner goddess rolled her eyes at the woman. She was being way too forward.

"Well I'll have a diet coke to drink and Elena will have…" He trailed off, waiting for her to decide as she removed her coat.

"I'll have a water—no ice, please." Elena simply said, wanting nothing more than to see the woman vanish.

"Perfect." The waitress named 'Danielle' beamed. "Can I start you two with an appetizer?"

"Umm…" Damon wondered, glancing in Elena's direction. "Would you like a little something before our meal?"

"Sure. I am so hungry," She laughed.

"Excellent." Damon smirked, a hint of seduction in his voice. "We'll take the cheese loaf to begin with. Thanks, Danielle," He glanced at her one last time before focusing the rest of his attention upon Elena. Any normal night and Damon would be all over the attractive cougar. She was his regular waitress here, and he came here often with it being his favorite restaurant. They had hooked up once or twice. She had been the one swooning over him since the beginning, clearly trying to get his attention for more. But he quickly shunned those thoughts aside because they no longer matter, not tonight. No, tonight was different. He needed to show Elena how special she was and how interested he was, in her. The waitress was just a waitress tonight and Damon silently hoped it would remain this way through his eyes from this day forward. After all, he never suceeded in staying with one woman, not after Katherine had his heart and then stomped on it with her six inch heels, and played with it like it was a toy.

"Coming right up." Danielle sighed, noticing his disinterest and scurried off.

"Finally." Damon rolled his eyes. "She wasn't very professional."

"It's kind of hard to remember what your job is when a man like you is speaking." Elena laughed, not helping his ego the slightest. "She seems to know you."

"A man like me?" Damon raised an eyebrow, clearly amused and playing along. "What is that supposed to mean, miss Gilbert?"

"You know exactly what that means, Salvatore" She said, crossing her arms.

"Yeah… and Danielle is just my usual." Damon answered sternly, his brows furrowing. Why was she making this hard?

"Your usual for sex?" Elena found the words blurting out of her mouth.

"My usual waitress for this restaurant, Elena," He deadpanned, his jaw locked. He clearly didn't like her comment. Tonight was not about the random hooker or waitress, tonight it was about _her._ However, he decided not to keep anything from her so it looks like this is where he would have to start. "We hooked up a couple times, it was nothing."

"Doesn't look like nothing" Elena mumbled.

"Well it is. Where did that come from?" He asked.

But Elena did not answer his question, for Danielle returned with the cheese loaf, still brooding.

"Are you two all ready to order?" Danielle asked cheerily still mostly addressing Damon, her eyes on his glorious body.

"Yes, we are," Elena said, looking at Damon who nodded in approval. "I'll have the quarter chicken dinner—white meat with mashed potato and a whole wheat roll please."

"Sounds good," Danielle said without writing down Elena's order. "Now, sir. What can I get you tonight?"

"I'd like the same meal please, Danielle—except I'll have a baked potato and can we have two gravy on the side?" He asked, holding up his index and middle finger.

"Of course." The waiter smiled. "Is there anything else I can get you?"

"No, that'll be all. Thanks Danielle" Damon said, queuing the old brunette to leave, stumbling for words.

"Damon?" Elena whispered catching his attention.

"Yes?" He asked.

"We should talk… about you know, um… the text messages." He was relieved that she had dropped the last conversation. In time he would talk about it, probably tonight but at least he had a drop of dignity left, for now.

"Right… well, I don't know what else there is to talk about."

"You said you feel things—for me. Things you want to explore." She said, neither of them exactly sure where she was going with this. Her heart started to beat faster in her chest, waiting for something-anything-to happen.

"Yes…" Damon said, waiting for her to continue. "And?"

"Well, what I want to know is… why?"

"Well I figured you would be hungry after a long day of work so I thou-"

"Not why you took me out to dinner, Damon." Elena laughed nervously, now noticing that he was constantly trying to change the subject. That wasn't happening though; she was going to get the answers she came looking for. Tonight. "Why would you want to 'explore' these said feelings you have for me?"

"I honestly have no idea." Damon concluded. "You make me feel things, which I haven't felt, well… ever." He shrugged, not knowing what else to do—or say. He hated feeling vulnerable, or in need. He was an independent man for Christ's sake.

"But you're so distant… and cold." Elena said, thinking about how he acted. "You're always strictly business and nothing more, minus the harmless flirting you do with me. But I've seen you at Bree's Damon; I watched you take home that girl way too easily."

"You saw that huh…" He said biting into a slice of cheese loaf, trying to look anywhere but at Elena. That really would explain why she had been on his case before Danielle showed up. She knew what he was like. Shit. This was not good at all.

"Yeah." Elena confirmed. "I did… and something's telling me that it's happened more often than once."

"Elena… you wouldn't understand. It's difficult to explain—" He began, not wanting to tell her his entire story. Not yet… but he feared and knew that if he had any chance at all in getting Elena interested, that he would have to tell her why he was… well, the way that he was.

"Then please tell me, Damon. Because I've been drawn to you ever since the moment I walked into your office. You confuse me. You flirt with me, and then you're cold towards me and then incidents like the other day where I fainted happen… and you're all sweet and caring—only to become distant and cold again. You're giving me whiplash here Damon and I don't know if you intended on giving me mixed signals or not but that's what you're doing." She thought for a moment, biting her lip and decided to add. "You've had me at hello. I don't know what that means. I have to get to know you to understand you...to understand myself."

"That was not my intentions at all." Damon answered honestly, looking into Elena's for the first time since they had begun talking. "I wanted you—since the moment you walked into my office but you're different than my usual," Elena cringed at the words he was saying. _Well_ She thought._ At least he has admitted to being a man whore._ "You're sweet, gentle, caring… and qualities that I'm not able to put my finger on. I find myself wanting to protect you more than any other patient because you're more than a patient to me."

Sweet talk, that's all he was doing. Elena tried to collect and assure herself that he was only saying this to have her the way he wanted. "Damon, save it. I don't have time to be lied to."

"I'm not lying to you Elena!" He raised his voice a little but it was still low. "I'm telling you the truth. I want to get to know you, Elena. If you'll just hear me out. I have a little story to tell you…" His voice lowered again, a hint of vulnerabbility in his voice.

"Then please," Elena whispered slightly agitated but couldn't find it in her heart to scowl at the man who was apparently going to reveal his dark secrets. "Do. I am all ears."

"Do you want to know why I am, the way I am?" He said, crossing his arms.

"That's the idea, yeah." Elena replied.

He ignored her witty remark and took a deep breath. "I have no time for relationships, Elena. I have my job to attend to."

"If that were true, you wouldn't be here on a date with me right now."

"I suppose that's true…" Damon thought aloud before correcting himself. "Well it's how I _was._ No more than two weeks ago."

Elena didn't reply. She waited for Damon to continue on like he said he would.

"Well anyway," He shook his head. "I didn't have much luck back a few years ago and it changed who I was."

Now Elena was curious. _The_ Damon Salvatore, a certified and professional oncologist, unlucky? It wasn't adding up. What had happened to him that was so drastic to make him the way that he was? "What happened?" Elena found herself whispering, no longer angry with him; curiosity and uncertainty filled its position. Something happened to this man, she was sure of that.

"I was engaged Elena." Whoa, major bomb. Elena had not anticipated that.

"When?" She questioned. "To whom?"

"While I was still in university and to Katherine Pierce." Katherine Pierce? Who was that woman and what had she done to Damon to make him the way he was? She had never pictured him for the settle-down type of guy but perhaps before Katherine come along he was. It seems he's a completely different person from before the engagement. Her heart tightened. Who the hell did Pierce think she is? Ruining a man's happiness? And she hadn't even heard his story yet...

"What happened, Damon?" Elena found herself asking quietly. She was on the edge of her seat. She was almost afraid though, afraid for him even though it had happened a very long time ago.

"We were happy or so I thought. I'd spent countless hours at the school, of course." Elena nodded her head understanding completely how important his career was to him. "I had a late class one night; it ran maybe an hour late. I can't really remember. Anyway, I came home and there was a trail of her clothes amongst the floor, leading up to her room. I think you can figure out the rest of this puzzle." He added icily, but in the dim light of the candles, Elena could've sworn that she saw his eyes glitter with unshed tears. She understood that he had been holding it in for too long.

"She cheated on you." Elena said, it wasn't a question. Damon nodded and Elena's hands flew to her mouth that had just dropped.

She realized that Damon was playing with his fork now, and Elena thought she caught a glimpse of the real Damon Salvatore-The fragile, human Damon Salvatore. Emotion clogged his voice as he said the next words, and Elena found herself wanting to cry.

"I loved her. I did what I could for her. I even got a part time job, _while_ attending medical school just to pay for the fucking rock I put on her finger."

"Damon that's horrible." She said, reaching across and placing her hand on his.

"You haven't heard the best part yet." Damon laughed a bitter laugh that startled her.

_What could possibly be wors__e__ than catching your fiancée cheating on you?_ Elena asked herself.

"That wasn't the first time she cheated on me. It was just the first time she had been caught." Damon swallowed. "And the other guy was my one and only brother."

Holy fucking shit. Stefan was the person Katherine had cheated on Damon with? This was too much, way too much. Elena could now see why Damon was so distant to the world. His own brother had betrayed him; the brother that Elena thought was the good one. Well, he obviously pulled a fast one on Elena… letting her hear whatever she wanted to hear. She would've never known if Damon hadn't said. Shit. How in the hell was Elena going to tell Damon now that she had went on a date with his brother last night? She had intended on telling him right from the get-go without worrying but now; now he would surely flip. She would wait until he finished his story; she owed him the decency to let him finish. After all, it was extremely hard for him and she had a queer feeling he wouldn't take the news too lightly.

The color had drained from Elena's face and her mouth was hanging loose as she stared at Damon. "Elena? What's wrong?" His concerned voice snapped her out of her mental dilemma as she shrugged it off.

"Nothing," She said, lying way too easily for her liking. "I just cannot believe your own brother would do something like that to you." That was better. At least she was telling the truth sort of.

"Yeah well after that my new motto was 'keep your enemies close, keep your family closer'. He smirked, trying to lighten the mood and trying to hide his pain but he didn't fool Elena. She was a very smart woman and she knew how much this affected him. It had torn him, obviously if he had become this way. He was officially fucked up—a hundred shades of fucked up and she was starting to understand why.

"Oh Damon," Elena soothed, rubbing his hand with her own. "What did you do after that?

Elena just wanted to get up and hug him. This man was being open and honest and vulnerable with her. Two weeks ago, Elena wouldn't have thought it to be possible that he was capable of showing emotion. She was truly marveling at him; in his glory. But now she understood so much better. It was his only way of coping—of dealing with the world after such a traumatizing turn of events.

"I did the opposite of what I should have done," Damon hissed. "I walked out without saying a word and didn't turn back. They kept their relationship but I found out later that it only lasted one more month. You want to know the really twisted part in all of this? Because this wasn't the main reason I changed." What could possibly be worse than this?

"What?" Elena found herself asking.

"They had a daughter together. She developed leukemia while she was extremely young. I was still in school when she got sick. I was… interning at the hospital with a doctor who agreed to show me the jest of things and my first day; they all came in seeking help. We started chemotherapy, and quite a while later we opted for a bone marrow transplant, hoping that would cure her once and for all. But the treatment rejected, and she passed away." Damon took a deep breath and swallowed. He sat up straighter than before, placing his fork and napkin back down. He gazed across at her, and he looked utterly desolate. "They named her after me you know—their daughter. Lily _Demi_ Salvatore. She was the most beautiful girl on the planet… exquisite blue eyes like the ocean, platinum blonde hair. I loved her, more than I had ever loved anybody and it was my duty to save her. She was my family—the only person who wouldn't betray me like the way Stefan and Katherine had. I was obligated to do it, as much as it pained me."

That was not what Elena had expected. This was bad. Horrible. He had lost everyone he had ever cared about in the blink of an eye and when he thought he was given a second chance with Lily, he was consumed by a rude awakening; forcing him to believe there would never be anybody available for him. Nobody to love him, nobody for him to love. Nobody for him to trust, to be his confidante. She gazed at him, trying to decipher what this all means. It means that from right from the beginning of his early adult life he felt alone—alone in this large world that held over seven billion people and for some reason; his mind contorted reality and made him think that nobody out there could be compatible with him. She couldn't blame him for trying to shut out the world. She locked her eyes with his to find him wiping a few tears away. She was startled, she never thought that this man was even capable to cry and feel.

And then it dawned on her, the picture of the little girl in his office. This was the reason for it, she had been one of his first patients and she had died. "You feel guilty." Elena whispered, desperately trying to understand.

"Yes." He looked briefly down at his plate of food and then he decided to proceed eating again.

"Damon" She whispered, glancing over at him. "You shouldn't feel this way. You are a doctor—you were only an intern at the time. It wasn't your fault. You're not God, you're not some miracle worker… you did what you could do and you probably tried a lot harder than any other doctor in the country would have." Elena felt the hoarseness invade her voice. She felt the aching that came with it as she struggled with her unshed tears.

"I didn't think it would be like that—like this," He sighed blinking slowly. "Her death—every death, kills me. I love my job but that is by far the worst part of it and unfortunately; it happens a lot. I thought I could handle it back in med-school. But I was wrong. And the only way I know—the only way I _can_ deal with it is to drink, seduce and ignore all the bourbon, woman and people that cross my path. I love my job; I love the money it gives me. I love knowing I have the power to save a life. But I equally hate it. I hate what it's turned me into; I don't know how to change. I hate that I fail, and people die at my hands." He runs a hand through his now unruly hair and sighs once more. "How's that for baggage?"

Oh he had baggage alright. And a lot of it. Elena gaped at him for a moment trying to take it all in, mentally listing out the new information she had just learned. He had fallen in love and got his heart broken. His fiancée had cheated on him, with his own brother. They had a child together. Lily got diagnosed with cancer and coincidentally got brought to Damon. Damon loves his family—he loved Lily with all his heart and then she was taken from him by the omen known as cancer. He thinks it's his fault. He thinks there's something wrong with him. He hates his job as much as he enjoys it. He fucks and drinks to access to numb his pain because it's the only way he can cope. He wanted her. She was wrong about him. She had judged him, she had pointed a finger at him before trying to understand what this man could've gone through.

"Oh, Damon." Elena said.

"I'm pretty fucked up, huh?" He smirked, his cold façade just around the corner.

"You got hurt a lot more than anybody should hurt in their life. I don't know what to say but I will say this. I understand why you lash out like this. I understand why you do all the things you do, even though they're horrible and wrong."

"You do?" His eyes grew larger.

"Yes. But none of it is your fault Damon. It was Katherine's loss. Not yours; she didn't deserve you from the beginning if she allowed herself to betray you like that. Your brother doesn't deserve you affection either."

They sat in silence, finishing their meal injecting the words that had just been spoken. It wasn't a comfortable silence but it was needed. Elena needed time to think about what it all meant and what her next move would be. She had to tell him about her and Stefan, immediately.

And Damon was silently at battle with himself, constantly going back and forth between regretting and not regretting telling Elena. It was far too easy to spill his heart out to her. He hadn't done that—ever. And he was wondering how he managed to do it so freely. It had been hard yes, but he had still managed it quickly and half easily and she hadn't judged him. She held his hand and smiled and assured him it wasn't his fault—she assured him that he wasn't alone. That every neglecting thought he had about himself the past years had been false and that there was still hope. He didn't believe her but she made him want to try. And as much of a stranger as she was, he wanted it to be with her. She was special, different.

"Are you full?" He managed to ask when she finished eating, placing her used napkin on the almost empty plate.

"Yes. It was delicious. You?" She glanced at his empty plate and was quickly answered. A smile came across her face. "I guess that answers it for me"

"I guess it does," He smiled back. He liked this—feeling so at ease and comfortable. He felt carefree for once, and it felt amazing. "Would you perhaps like a dessert?"

"No, thank-you" She quickly said shaking her head slightly. "If I eat another bite, I fear I'll explode."

"You're being over dramatic," He smirked.

"Perhaps." Elena agreed. "I am extremely full, though. Thank you for dinner, it was delicious."

"My pleasure. I hope to be able to indulge you more often." He said quietly, half smiling.

"Damon, there's something I have to tell you." Elena said nervously.

"You can tell me anything, Elena." He answered, feeling concerned regarding her nervousness. "What is it?"

"I know Stefan." Elena deadpanned as she watched Damon's features contort. His worried expression changed to confusion.

"You know Stefan?" He repeated. "How?"

"We met yesterday morning at Tim Horton's. I went in for once because the line was long and he was in front of me."

"Well that was…" Damon trailed off, grasping for the appropriate word. "… An unfortunate event for you. But I don't understand where you're going with this." His brows furrowed and once again Danielle returned at the wrong time.

"How was everything?" She asked happily, seeming to have brushed off her sour mood.

"It was wonderful" Damon answered for both of them.

"How will you be paying tonight, Mr. Salvatore?" She asked.

"On my card, as usual." He replied removing it from his wallet and placed it into the mini-machine she had provided without even checking the amount.

"I can pay for mine you know." Elena said.

"No. It's my treat." He insisted, and Elena knew right then and there he was as stubborn as her and surrendered almost immediately. After all, it was sweet that he was paying for her.

"Here you are, Mr. Salvatore," The waitress said, passing him back his card and receipt. "Thank you. And two you have a lovely evening."

"Good evening, Danielle." Damon concluded. Elena remained silent and simply smiled at the middle aged lady before she walked away, leaving them alone once more.

"Why are you telling me you met Stefan yesterday? It's no big deal. You probably won't see him again." Damon shrugged, applying his coat to his lean, chiseled shoulders.

"I did see him again," Elena whispered and watched Damon's eyes nearly pop out of his head.

"What do you mean?" He demanded. She felt the rage in Damon coming, along with the coldness.

"He asked me out to dinner and I did…" Elena said quickly.

"You what?" Damon nearly spat.

"I don't know him!" Elena voiced back. How could I have possibly known he betrayed you—broke you? I didn't!"

"That's not the point!" Damon gushed, bewildered. "You went on a date with him last night at this exact time and tonight you are here with me! I will not share you, Elena! You. Are. Mine." He finished coldly, eerily. "I'm done being second best." His knuckles turned white, and Elena feared that he was going to break something.

"I am not yours, Damon" Elena hissed back. "I'm not asking you to share me!" She threw her hands up in exasperation. 'I went on one date with Stefan, not knowing who he was or what he did. That's all. It's not like it would ever happen again after what you told me; do you think that little of me?" She asked, searching his face for answers before proceeding. "I agreed to going to dinner with him because I thought you were a lost cause. I'm interested in you and you showed no signs of you feeling the same. I wasn't going to pine over somebody, wanting them knowing I never could!" She found herself saying.

"Even if that's true" Damon started. "Why the fuck didn't you tell me that when we were texting last night?" His mouth contorted into a look of disgust. "That's why you didn't answer the phone. That's why you took so long to reply to my voicemail. You were with _him__,__"_

"Do you hear yourself right now?" Elena asked, extremely surprised in his behavior. "You're being irrational, Damon."

"I'm being irrational?" He let out a hard laugh, a laugh that screamed hurt and rage being masked. "I cannot believe you right now. I confided my deepest, darkest secrets in you thinking you were different. But it turns out you're not what I expected."

"Damon." Elena begged. "Please don't say that. I didn't mean to hurt you. That's why I told you!"

"Save it." He put his hand up and stood up. I don't want to hear it. Your first chemo session is in three days at four. You're going to have to leave work early. Goodbye, Elena." And just like that, his attitude changed. He was like this other cold monster because of her. This ws all her fault.

"Damon," Elena called out but he kept walking calmly although inside he was screaming.

What had she done?

* * *

AN: I know this is up a little later than usual but I'm currently on vacation #2 here in Quebec with my dad and couldn't get internet until yesterday! Thank you Amy (LiveBreatheVampire) for doing this almost instantly after I sent it. You're help is most appreciated. :)

I hope this chapter was well worth the wait, and I hope you leave me a review :)


	8. VIII

_I need you to be my miracle_

_VIII*_

* * *

"Sounds like that backfired 'Lena." Caroline mumbled after her friend filled her in of her second disaster of a date. She had told her _everything._ "You knew they were brothers, maybe you should have told Damon at first."

"Whose side are you even on?" Elena spat back, annoyed. "I didn't want to tell him the moment I got there!" She wasn't pleased that Caroline was judging her. Sure, it had been a total disaster, but it wasn't her fault.

Ever since the night before she had been a mess. She had felt so horrible even though Damon made it out to be a bigger deal than it was. He had completely spun everything out of proportion, but that didn't help to erase the expression on his face just before he went ballistic. He had been hurt, genuinely hurt after being so happy that evening. It had really been the first time Elena had seen him as happy as he had been and she had to go and snatch that happiness right from him. But no. It wasn't even her fault really. Damon knew her way longer and only decided to do something about it the day of her date with Stefan. It seemed like a pretty big coincidence to her. Nonetheless, she still felt like shit about what had happened. There was one upside to all of it though; at least she hadn't kissed the two of them… Although, she was pretty sure that she'd rather her first kiss in months had been with Damon instead of Stefan. Don't get her wrong; Stefan really was a gentleman to her. Someone she was looking for, for a very long time. Someone who could make her believe in herself. And he had made her laugh, blush and smile almost instantly to whatever he said. But that was the most Elena knew about Stefan Salvatore. The sweet guy trying to pick up the sweet girl. It was so simple yet so complicated...But yet again, her life had always been so complicated. What wasn't working for her was what Damon told her. How could somebody's brother do that to his own family? For one, that alone would drive Elena very clear from Stefan. She was going through hell and hurting physically, she did not want him to hurt her emotionally too. Dating Stefan was trouble, she was sure of it. Him doing that to _her_ Damon, that was beyond pushing it, it was proof enough that she shouldn't trust him. Not to mention the fact that she could never be with somebody who cheat. You couldn't. Elena would never settle for a cheater and so, because of those two very important qualities in a relationship—trust and honesty, Stefan was simply no longer in the picture. She was expecting a call from him later this evening and that's when she would tell him she didn't want to see him again.

"Yours of course." Caroline squealed, offended as if Elena had just asked a very stupid question. "I just understand where Damon's coming from… Wouldn't you be upset Elena if he dated your sister the day before he dated you?"

"I don't have a sister!" She answered a little too quickly even though she knew what Caroline meant.

"You know what I mean, Elena." Her friend threw her hands up in the air before running them through her long, blonde hair. "You are so stubborn you know that?"

"Yes, I do." She admitted rather proudly before sighing. "Oh Care. What do I do?"

Caroline remained silent for a moment as if contemplating what to say to her best friend but then her eyes grew wide. "Elena, hold up." She quickly put her hand up. "Damon's your doctor?"

Oh shit. She should have left that part out. "Yes…"

"Why is Damon your doctor?" The blonde asked again.

Elena knew that Caroline wouldn't let this one go without getting an answer.

"Just check up's and whatnot." Elena shrugged before turning away which she shouldn't have done. Caroline always knew when she was lying.

"You've been having check up appointments regularly for the past three weeks?" Caroline asked a little agitated.

"Yup." Elena said popping the 'p'. "But I've got to run. Lot's to do…" And she quickly excused herself from her friend's office thankful that Caroline didn't know of her cancer. Yet. That girl was a clever one and she was probably going to fill in the missing pieces very soon.

* * *

"Morning doc." A seductive voice purred beneath the white duvet.

"Good morning, Samantha." Damon groaned, stretching and yawning, his hair still tousled after he had practically became tangled with the stranger in his bed.

"It's Sara!" The body belonging to the voice shot up out of bed in a panic.

"Whatever." Damon brushed her off as she tried to snuggle into his chest. "What the hell do you think you're doing?" He asked as he peeled her hand of his torso. He had warned her that this was nothing than a one night stand. What was she still doing there?

"I'm trying to give you a proper good morning." The brunette pouted. "Maybe it will help you remember my name. You couldn't seem to get it right last night either. You kept calling me Ellen or some other name. That's nowhere close to Samantha!"

"For one, I don't want a proper good morning." Damon spat, pushing her rather roughly away from him. She was getting on his nerves. "Nor do I want to remember your name. I will probably never lay my eyes on you again. I don't know if you've realized sweetheart, but this was a one night stand." Ellen? That could only be an error for one name. _Elena fucking Gilbert,_the girl who was going to drive him crazy.

"But I—"She began.

"But nothing." Damon silenced her. "You spent the night which you shouldn't have. I told you that before we got here yet here you are!" His voice raised a little as he made motions with his hands.

"I was tired." She retorted.

"I don't care if you were dying." Damon snapped. "I told you not to stay the night."

This caused the brunette's eyes to open widely and really take in his tone of voice and his expression. "For someone as hot as yourself, you sure are a fucking prick." And with that, Samantha wrapped the white sheet around her body and took it with her as she retrieved her clothing from various places in Damon's condo. He didn't think he'd seen anybody get dressed as fast as that before.

"Have a nice life." Damon sung out sweetly not expecting a response. What he did get was a slam of his door. That was one thing he hated most about his condo. Being alone. Because being alone meant you have time to think and time to think meant all those repressed memories that he usually kept at bay with women, work and alcohol would backfire with full force and there was only so much he could do to keep it cool and to retaliate within himself, even after his emotions were turned off. After all, he was still human. Sometimes the solitude made him feel sorrow, it reminded him of the layers of ice wrapped around his soul—he knew that there could be a kind person underneath, but it would take lots of time to make him visible.

She definitely wasn't worth the call to work faking sick late last night. But oh well, he had the day off. Not like he wanted to be at work today anyway. Not when his mind was on _her._

He had left Swiss Chalet furious not even bothering to go home. He sped the entire way to Bree's bar before plopping his ass on one of her stools and drinking glass after glass of his favorite bourbon. It was his medicine; it was what made him emotionless. That's where the brunette comes in. She sauntered up next to him, gave him a wink and stuck her ass in his direction as she ordered over the counter. And he couldn't help but notice the resemblance to Elena. She had the same color hair, the same olive skin, the same hourglass figure and from back on; she really looked like Elena. That should have been his queue right then and there to refrain from her obvious flirting but the truth was, he was drunk and he wanted Elena so he would get the closest thing to that woman as possible. The sex had been good sure, but not good enough for Damon to keep her around. And he didn't even try to see her as another person, all he saw her as was Elena's substitute. As he lay is hands all over her gorgeous body, all he could think about was that Elena's would've been much beautiful and sexier, and he felt angry that he couldn't have it, that he couldn't have _her._

Damon shook her head riding the thoughts as he reached for his phone. The hospital probably called even though he called in sick last night. It wasn't like Damon to not go to work, ever. But there was nothing from the hospital. Only one text message. And he didn't want to read it. But he found himself opening it quicker than he had anticipated. Obviously, because whatever that girl did made him react quicker and differently than he usually did.

_Damon. I'm sorry about last night. Please, let me explain. Call me, Elena._

_Fucking perfect,_ Damon thought. And it wasn't as if he could ignore her, could he? Actually that's what he was going to do, try and get her off his mind. He wouldn't be able to do that if he actually gave in and called her. He was _never_soft and forgiving and that wasn't about to change because he developed feelings for one woman with cancer who swept him of his feet. And she had hurt him too, and Damon Salvatore didn't do hurt. He was Damon Salvatore, period.

What was he even doing, chasing her? He wouldn't care if it was a simple fuck and chuck like every other female patient but Elena Gilbert was different. He didn't want to fuck and chuck her. He took her to a restaurant for a date for Christ's sake. That was way beyond him, she had possessed and obsessed him, it had to be the only reason because that never happened. Damon Salvatore didn't do dates, or if he did, it would've ended up a date and sex. And he hadn't planned on having sex with her after their meal either. No, he had planned on parting ways after a casual night. He had thought of being civil, of pleasing her without sex, of caring for her in a certain way. That was not like him and he was setting himself up for disaster. The woman started chemo. She was fighting the biggest battle of her life and he was her fucking doctor. He wouldn't get attached. His job was just to make her better, not fantasize about her. He'd seen it before. Their chemotherapy failed. The other treatments and transplants failed and they died within a year, maybe two. There was a big chance Elena would survive this but what if he fell for her and she ended up dying on him? What kind of fucking state would he be in then? If he falls for her and she dies on him he'll be broken again, he'll truly be a soulless monster. That was it. No more chasing after what could be a lost cause. Yes, he tried to convince himself, she's a lost cause. She's nothing more. And my patient, he added mentally, but strictly nothing more. She may be the first girl in over five years that he actually took a fancy to, but it that meant getting his heart possibly broken in the future; he was going to spare his heart the hurt and steer away before he could get any deeper.

* * *

"_Elena you have a visitor_." The lady at the front desk informed her via phone. Who could possibly be here to see her? Nobody ever came to her work. She felt butterflies in her stomach and curiosity.

"Who is it?" Elena asked.

"_I'm not sure_." She replied. "_But he is very handsome_." She added in a whisper, probably so the man couldn't hear her. Elena's heart stopped at that, what if it was Damon? What if he wanted to talk in person? She wasn't prepared for this. She needed time to adjust, to prepare her speech, her explanation.

"Send him up." Elena responded, not waiting for a reply. She kept fidgeting in her chair waiting for the 'mystery' man to appear. And then came the awaited knock. "Come in." She hollered.

The door opened slowly and in walked… Stefan?

"Stefan." Elena deadpanned. "What are you doing here?"

He walked toward her and went behind the desk until he was started next to her. He pulled his hands from behind his back revealing a bouquet of orange and purple daisies. "I wanted to come by and ask you to come to my place, tonight—for dinner." His face was so angelic and good-looking that Elena almost forgot that he was the same man who destroyed her Damon's life.

"Those flowers are lovely." Elena whispered. "Thank you but I don't think dinner is such a good idea, Stefan."

"And why not?" He asked, raising his eyebrow. He clearly wasn't expecting her to say no.

"I know what you did to Damon." Her words came out as judgmental, but she decided to go along with it.

"Excuse me?" He asked, a bit confused by her statement.

"I know what you did to Damon and how you partook in messing up his relationship."

"How?"

"He told me." Elena said calmly even though they were no longer on talking terms. That was it, which was a weight, lifted off her chest.

"I've changed, Elena." Stefan cried, as soon as her words sank in. He didn't like to be reminded of something that he did, something that was in the past, a silly mistake. "What I did back then was a mistake. I'd change what happened if I could but I can't. Me and Katherine have been over for a long time. I'm a very changed man."

"How can I trust you?" Elena asked, furrowing her brows as she looked back and forth from Stefan to her paperwork.

"Get to know me. Trust me." He whispers as he leans down and places a kiss on her head. "I'll give you time. The offer for this evening is still up if you want."

"That's not a good idea Stefan." She warned him.

"Come on, Elena. I really want to know you. You seem like a big-hearted woman. Try and open your heart to me, forgive me." His eyes looked like puppy eyes as he pouted, and if she didn't care for Damon she was probably forgiving him now. But she cared about Damon more than that and the idea simply disgusted her. However, he wasn't taking no for an answer and Elena know one hundred percent that she didn't want to 'get to know him'. He may seem nice but what lies beneath the surface is much more dark, and she believed every word of what Damon said because…well, why would he lie? She knew what she had to do to get him to leave and she didn't like the idea because that meant more people figuring out. Caroline almost had and even though she doesn't know Stefan—nor ever will—she hated people knowing.

"You want to know why Damon's my doctor?" Elena asked.

"What?" Stefan asked confused.

"Damon is my doctor. Damon is an oncologist." She said slowly, as if talking to a child. It had come off a little more sarcastic than she had intended, which was ironic since she was talking about her life-threatening disease.

"I know what my brother does for a living, Elena." He answered.

"Well you should know an oncologist is a cancer doctor which only means one thing." Elena held her arms up before letting them flop down at her sides. "I'm a newly discovered leukemia patient and your brother is my cancer doctor." There. The word vomit she hadn't wanted to regurgitate.

"You…what?" Stefan asked, bewildered.

"I have cancer, Stefan. There's no future with me."

"There's treatment. My brother—he's the best there is." He had turned pale and he was stammering now, but he was still trying to keep himself calm and offer her hope.

"Yes he is." Elena agreed. "But he isn't a miracle worker."

"I've…got to go." He stammered. His skin was now pale as snow. "The offer still stands, Elena."

"Bye, Stefan." Elena said, choosing to ignore his last comment. Could she really 'get to know' this guy that had broken his own brothers heart so badly? Could she really do that to Damon? He wasn't talking to her and God only knew when he would come around but she couldn't stoop that low. It didn't matter anyway. What she had just told him probably sent him running to the hills—that's what she was hoping. He wouldn't want her now anyway, she wasn't worth it. Not every man decided to date a woman who was dying Hell; he had already run for the hills. He'd turned white as a ghost and left almost immediately after she broke the news. She doubted that the offer 'really still stood'. He was just being extremely nice.

And unfortunately, she couldn't get Damon Salvatore out of her fucking head all day. She was trying to contemplate how to approach him, should it be calm and subtle after she let him simmer down? Or should it be right away. She was leaning toward the first idea; she wanted him to come to her. Not because she was stubborn—which she was but because she didn't know how he'd react or when he'd finally forgive her—if he ever did. Also, she didn't think she was ready to tell him and beg him to forgive her, she still needed time, and she didn't want to lose him by saying a wrong word. He should forgive her; it wasn't that big of a deal even though Elena knew what she did was wrong. She didn't sigh as much in her life as she did that day, sat all alone with her thoughts at her large oak desk.

* * *

Damon on the other hand was at a place you would never expect… Bree's. Well, a place that any outsider would never expect him to be.

"This is your second night in a row here Damon." Bree stated, noticing something was up. She had worked there for God knows how long; she had started to read people like they were leaflets.

"What's your point?" Damon asked downing his glass of bourbon. "I'll take another one please."

"It's a week night." Bree walked over toward the whisky bottle sighing but still refilled his glass. "I know it's not my place but don't doctors' usually work on weekdays?"

"Yes they do." Damon said grabbing the glass. By now he was feeling pretty good although pretty shitty on the inside. "I couldn't care less about my job at the moment, Bree." And he truly didn't care.

"I suspect a girl has something to do with this."

Damon raised his eyebrow at her. "What makes you so sure?"

"You weren't here for a week or more which means you had no reason to drink—thus meaning you had someone or something to do stuff with, something to get things off your mind other then the bourbon." She leaned forward, holding her face up with her hands.

"You're pretty clever for somebody that owns a pub you know that?"

"Yes, I do." Bree chuckled a little trying to lighten the mood even though Damon's accusation was pretty serious. "I can detect body language pretty good. I understand why people drink after being around it for nearly twenty years every day. I see people come in here everyday snagging women and men galore which usually meant they're lonely. I also see people come in here every now and again drinking and dancing the night away with random people so they can blow off steam, or to not face their problems at home or at work. Alcohol and dancing are great distractions, Damon but they happen to last just for a few hours. And then there are people like you." She pointed at his head. "You come in here a few times a week. You drink until you cannot simply drink anymore. You have money, an excellent career. Everything you could ever ask but you're lonely and that's why you take girls home with you each night you're here. You try to shut people out, to convince yourself that you don't need anyone in your life but it backfires. I can see it, Damon...I know that you want someone to care for and I know that right now you're hurt. I may only know your job and your name, Damon but I know you a lot better than you think." She pulled back crossing her arms, satisfied with her speech.

Damon took a few moments taking in what she said. It had caught him off guard but she had got him to a tee. He contemplated on telling her to go to hell and walking out but what good would that do? Even though he had to bite his tongue to stop himself from saying something offensive, she was right, and he knew that.

"You're definitely a lot smarter than you look." He stated.

"Damn right, hinny." Bree winked turning away and going about her business.

"Wait." Damon called.

"What, Damon?" Bree turned back around, her hands on her hips.

"She's one of my patients, Bree."

The middle age woman now understood. "So—"She began.

"So she has leukemia." Damon finished for her. "And the night before I took her to dinner, my brother did."

"So she's interested in the two of you?" Bree assumed.

"Yes…no. I don't think so. They met that morning at Tim Horton's and he asked her to dinner. She didn't know he was my brother." He processed the words for his own sake as well, trying to convince myself that it wasn't really Elena's fault either.

"So why are you here drunk? Because she has cancer or because she was with your brother?"

"Both, I guess." He admitted. "More so that she was with my brother. But it's all playing on my mind now. I want to get to know her, she seems amazing. I haven't met a woman like her. But she just started chemo and what if it doesn't work? What if I...fall for her?"

Bree didn't really know what to say. "If it doesn't, it doesn't. You can't go about life thinking 'what if' Damon. You have to go for what you want in life. And to be blunt—if what you want is a girl with leukemia, then you go for her. And if things work out, you'll be there every step of the way to help her in her battle. And if you fall for her then you should go along with it. There's nothing wrong in falling in love, Damon."

"It makes you weak."

"Let me tell you something, Damon. Being able to share and give without expecting anything in return, being able to hold the woman you love as she cries without judging her and being able to live with a person who might have a different character than yours is something that only a strong person can do. Love makes you strong, not weak." With that, she left to serve the third glass of scotch to a middle aged man.

And somewhere inside that thick head of his, the light sparked and he realized what Bree was saying. He slid off the barstool and headed toward the door. "Thank you Bree." He called out. "I know what I've got to do."

"Anytime, Damon." She called back but it landed on deaf ears. Damon was already out through the door and hoping into the nearest taxi.

"Corner of Jane, first apartment building." Damon panted.

"Yes, sir." The taxi driver obeyed.

Damon was pretty drunk. Way to drunk to drive to Elena's and probably way too drunk to be heading over her house but he needed to see her. He didn't want to be mad at her. Bree was right—he couldn't spend his life contemplating about the "what if's."

"Here you are, sir." The taxi came to a stop and Damon paid the man and practically leapt out of the vehicle. He ran into the building, up the two flights of stairs and he was face-to-face with her door.

His heart stopped realizing that it was in fact, a week day and that she may not be home yet. But his watch read 11:30pm which meant that she had been off work quite some time now. And it also told him that he had been drinking for the better part of the day. His body wasn't going to like him in the morning. He pounded on the door a little louder than he had intended and waited, his heart beating fast.

The door opened and there she was. Looking stunning as ever although she looked a little upset. But Damon already knew why. "Damon." She whispered.

"Elena." He whispered back.

"What are you doing here?"

"I came to see you. I came to forgive you." His words slurred at the end and he mentally kicked himself in the ass for it.

"You're drunk." She stated.

"Only a little." He answered. "May I come in?"

"My brother's here. I don't think it's such a good idea."

"Well I want to talk to you." He hiccupped.

"I think you should go home and get some rest. We could talk tomorrow." She offered, afraid that the words he'll say to her will mean nothing when he's sober.

"Elena. I don't want to wait until tomorrow. Please." He begged and she sighed knowing she had given into him.

"Oh, come on." Elena mumbled, stepping out into the hall and closing her apartment door.

"Where are you taking me?" Damon asked from behind her.

"To the roof." She replied. "You need the fresh air."

"Right." He hiccupped again.

They climbed three flights of stairs—very slowly for Damon's sake. The view from the roof was spectacular. You could see the better part of the city twinkling in all its glory. The buildings were all lit up, the night drivers' vehicles lights' danced on the asphalt and the stars finalized the picture before them. Normally with all the smog and pollution, you couldn't see many stars but tonight was an exception. Elena spotted the big dipper right away and the North Star. She looked over at Damon who was already plopped against the brick chimney and fast asleep. She decided not to disturb him and let him rest, wanting to admire the innocent sleepy face. He was lying there looking completely like an angel. She seated herself beside him and starred off into the beautiful night sky before it dawned on her.

She rummaged through her purse quickly and pulled out the piece of paper she had been looking for. It was crumbled but she opened it up knowing that she was going to be on the roof all night with Damon.

_Last Wishes..._

_#1. Go on an African safari._

_**#2. Camp out under the stars**._

_#3. Go to an all-you-can-eat-buffet and eat until I puke._

_#4. Fall in love, unconditionally and recklessly._

_#5. Have sex in the bathroom of an airplane._

_#6. See Metallica live._

_#7. Parasail._

And scratched out number two. She smiled. One wish completed—with Damon.

* * *

**A/N: Did you all forget about this story? I know it seem like I did but I didn't. As you all know I was vacation-ing with my dad in Quebec and I then went to Colorado for ten days with my nan and it was safe to say that I had NO time to start on this story until I got back home which I extremely apologize. I hope this makes up for how long I was gone :) Thanks to AMY(LiveBreatheVampire) for getting this proofread extra quick for me (she's like speedy Gonzales. ;) and I love her for it) **

**PS. For those of your reading mine and Amy's collaboration story here on my profile-what lies beneath-there will be an update very soon :)**


	9. IX

**I need you to be my miracle**

**IX**

* * *

Morning had come way quicker than Elena had anticipated. But hopefully with this new day, came new chances, new emotions and new views. Ever since she was diagnosed with cancer she welcomed the day and appreciated it. She didn't know when she was going to die so she needed to make the most of everything. New days meant chances to fix broken relationships with people. In fact, she had been calling her old friends from school, just to hear her voices. Now all she could thing about was Damon. She hoped Damon wasn't angry like he had been. That was the reason he had come to her in the first place last night but he had been drunk so the next day, you can never be too sure if the person meant what they said or not. She was hoping he had forgiven her.

She had instantly regretted agreeing to go on a date with the two of them, even though—truth be told, she hadn't done anything wrong. Damon had been angry with her, Damon had been disappointed in her and that made her feel terrible and ashamed. And learning the truth about Stefan and his past with Katherine and Damon only made things even worse, she felt bad for even _considering_ Stefan as a possibility, if only for a moment. Even though she didn't know, it made her stomach churn at the thoughts that she once had about him. But Damon had never left her head and if he had that affect on her this early into whatever you wanted to call their relationship, then there were obviously feelings flowing amongst them.

Elena remained completely still as she watched the sun rise up over the city, beyond the skyscrapers and buildings. It actually looked quite beautiful. The sun cast a yellow over glow upon the whole city, making the light shimmer and twinkle off of the cars' of the night's lights. The city was growing busier by the second, people waking up to go to work; people just returning home from work in desperate need for sleep and then there was Elena. Elena and Damon—who were supposed to be getting ready for their work day as well but Damon put a kink in their plans the moment he decided to get ossified on a week night. But looking at him in the moment—watching him sleep—watching how serene and peaceful he looked made the long sleepless night become worth it. In fact, she could almost die there, because it was her idea of heaven. It wasn't too often that she was given the chance to really appreciate him and study him and see his expression sans wrinkles. He was always too worried, too flirty, too concentrated on his work or apparently too drunk to be at peace, for even just five minutes. From what she had collected, his life was nothing but hectic. Work, sleep, work sleep, throw in a few glasses of bourbon and a handful of women and that was his life in a nutshell. Despite his attitude, Elena felt that Damon's character was just a facade he made to hide the pain. Elena knew that in reality, Damon was just a sad and lonely person.

Seeing him now, made her feel hope. Hope that would confirm her beliefs—that deep inside, perhaps very deep inside there was a man waiting to be saved. Beneath this mask was a sweet hearted doctor that wanted nothing more than love. Instead of him saving her, maybe she could save him with time. Because right now, Elena was leaning towards the idea of that with him. She had been attracted to him, at first just because of his looks but then when she meet him over and over; there was something in him, pulling her to him and wanting to help him. He was dark, mysterious, flirtatious and rebellious but at the same time he was sincere, sweet, kind, and should she dare say it, romantic. Yes, he was more than just the sexy doctor or the man with the icy blue eyes. He was special, and she wanted to save him. Damon possessed both side of qualities that most people only had one side of. And Elena liked that. She just prayed that she hadn't blown it.

Glancing over at Damon she noticed he was finally waking up.

"Morning." She whispered as he stretched out his arms and legs taking in his surroundings and realizing where he was.

"Good morning." He answered groggily. "I've been out here all night haven't I?"

"Yes." Elena sighed smiling at him. He looked too cute, still half asleep. "But I stayed here with you."

"Thank you." He whispered leaving a silence between them for a moment before he broke it again. "Listen Elena… about last night. I'm really sorry about barging into your apartment building and pounding on your door late at night."

"It's fine Damon." Elena assured him grabbing his hand and squeezing it. "Really." _More than fine, _she wanted to say.

"No." He disagreed. "It was childish of me and I really do mean it when I say I'm sorry."

"Damon, please don't think anything of it." Elena begged. "You were drunk; people do stupid things when they're drunk."

"You wouldn't talk to me." He whispered vulnerably.

"I didn't want you to say things you didn't mean, Damon." She explained nervously, still holding onto his hand. "I didn't want you to have to take it all back in the morning. I just want this to last...not some kind of dream that I'm dreaming."

"I meant everything I said to you, Elena." Damon said, locking eye contact with the chocolate brown orbs he loved. "And if you let me say what I had intended on coming here and saying, I would have meant every single word of that too."

"Really?" Elena found herself mouthing even though no voice came out. She was skeptical about his words, because apart from their last conversation, he was basically contradicting himself. Damon always left her speechless, but today...it was different. She felt like she was in a movie.

"Yes." He exasperated throwing his hands in the air. Typical Damon, so over dramatic. "I forgive you, Elena."

"But why?" She asked. "I knew he was your brother and I didn't tell you right away when I should have."

"No, you didn't." He agreed, looking away clearing not too impressed with the thought. "But you didn't know what he did. And I didn't give you any reason to remain single. For Christ's sake, I was simply _just_ your hot doctor until I asked you on a date." He threw Elena a short smirk. "There was no way in hell you could have known; I didn't give you any signals." He sighed. "This is all new for me, Elena. I don't know what I'm doing. But all I know is that it hurt me deeply when you told me you went on that date with Stefan but there's something inside of me that cares for you. I don't want to see you with someone else, Elena. That part of me is willing to forgive you." He flashed her a quick, sincere smile. "That part of me has _already _forgiven you I should say."

"Well why didn't you call me sooner? You could have at least texted me." She offered sadly. "Do you know how hard it was to go days without talking to you? I hated myself for what I did, Damon. And I hated staying away from you."

"It was hard for me too." Damon admitted. He just hadn't shown it, he focused his thoughts elsewhere.

"Well." She stood up and walked over toward the ledge of the roof, peering off into the newly lit day. "All of this." She gestured with her hands, still not bothering to look back at Damon. "All of this has to mean something Damon."

"And it does." He whispered into her ear, starling her as he wrapped his arms around her waist from behind. He pulled her in close to him, allowing her to feel the heat from his body radiate onto hers; it was a nice feeling. A safe feeling. A _right_ feeling. "Like I told you." He murmured into her ear. "I wasn't in a relationship for a very long time and I didn't think I ever would be in one, until I met you. All I ask is to be patient with me. Give me a chance, Elena. I'm willing to try for you. I want you to be mine."

Elena simply nodded and continued to look forward, not really knowing what to say. You know the saying two wrongs make a right? Well she had been diagnosed with cancer and she had hurt Damon, those were two wrongs. And they indeed made a right.

"So where do we go from here?" Elena finally found the courage to talk after what seemed like hours passed. The feeling of his arms around her was soothing her, and the way that his fingertips danced on her stomach made her body throb with desire.

"We take it slow." Damon said, squeezing her hand like she had done prior to. "I don't know if I can be what you want me to be but I will try to change my ways. I'll do anything for you."

"Hey." Elena said turning to face him. She cupped face with both of her hands and stared right into his ocean blue eyes. "I like you now, just the way you are." And with those words, she found her courage. She leaned in slowly, savoring the moment and still unsure he would respond but when her lips found his, all her worries faded away. It was only one kiss—but that one kiss held so much. That kiss held the passion between them, and their lives joining as one. At least that was what Elena felt. When they finally pulled away and opened their eyes, both were smiling all too happily at one another.

However Elena couldn't deny the wave of coldness she felt when they pulled away. It was almost like she was stripped naked in public. She felt vulnerable, she felt interdependent, she _needed_ him.

Noticing her shiver, Damon pulled her closer to him again, and Elena instantly felt warm and safe...and protected.

* * *

I'm going to start off by saying thanks to everybody who are following and reviewing to this story, I love writing it and I love knowing that with a subject as touchy as this that I am still getting great feedback.

Secondly, I am beyond sorry for not uploading this in 29 days to be exact, one month tomorrow. Greatly sorry. School's started, it was my birthday, I had updates on my other two stories and I guess I just didn't find the time.

I know this isn't as long as my chapters for this story normally are but I felt extremely bad and I knew it'd take me to at least Wednesday to make this chapter longer so I decided to make a short one. But, I also thought where I ended it was a good, suspenseful place to leave you all hanging ;)

Thanks Amy( LiveBreatheVampire) for your amazing work.)

And once again everybody who reads this; I hope you're still following me even thought I've been AWOL. I promise not to let it go this long again, next chapter will be normal length and perhaps longer. I'm starting on it right away, regardless that I haven't touched Instant Attraction or What lies beneath yet.

xoxo, and review :)


	10. X

**I need you to be my miracle **

**X**

* * *

"Jeremy!" Elena yelled out from her bathroom. No answer. "Jeremy!"

"What?!" Her brother yelled, running to the bathroom and opening the door without bothering to knock. Everytime he heard his sister call, Jeremy's stomach filled with butterflies.

"My hair." She cried holding up her hands and revealing the large bunches of her brown locks that were between her fingers. "It's starting Jer."

"Elena." He whispered, noticing she was about to cry. He embraced his sister into a hug, rubbing her back and comforting her as she began to cry.

"It's a part of the treatment 'Lena." He told her. "It will all be worth it in the end."

"This is just the beginning though, Jer." She sobbed into his shoulder. He could feel that his shirt was wet from tears but that was the least of his concerns right now. He knew how hard this was going to be for her, and it pained him to think about what she must be going through.

"And we'll get through this together." He promised her. "Nobody said this was going to be easy 'Lena but you're strong. One of the strongest people I know. You'll fight this—you'll win this battle."

"I don't know about that." She whispered. "I can't even imagine how much worse it's going to get. It may all fall out."

"And if so, I'll buy you a wig. A different one for every day of the week if I need to." She loved her brother. As serious as he was, he always fit in a tiny bit of humor between all the tension and it made her feel a little bit better. "Besides, you may not loose it all."

"As nice as that sounds, I don't think it'd look too pretty." Elena sighed but smiled. "I'd look like Angelica's Barbie doll from Rugrats." She forced herself to think about the happy things instead of the fact that she was going to lose her favourite brown locks.

"I can remember all too well the day you actually almost did that." He pointed out, laughing at the memory.

"How do you even remember that?" She asked, her too remembering it as if it were yesterday. "I was barely eight."

"I had a good memory for a child?" He guessed, shrugging his shoulders and tapping his sister lightly on the nose. "I guess it runs in the family, Gilbert."

"_Elena Ann Gilbert!" Her mother's stern voice echoed through the kitchen. "Drop the scissors wherever you are, now!"_

_Seven year old Elena quickly put her hand over her mouth to contain the laughter that was stewing up inside her. Her free hand held the scissors that her mother obviously noticed had gone missing. She was hiding underneath the table, ready to give herself her 'dream hairstyle". She knew that her mummy wasn't going to be pleased._

"_Elena, where are you?" Her mother called out. She peered through the table cloth and watched her mother's feet move around the kitchen, raiding the cupboards and checking the front veranda. She giggled, thinking that no one would ever discover her hiding place. It was the safest place in the house, right?_

_She released the table cloth and backed away a little bit quietly about to continue her pursuit when her mothers hand shot in through the cloth, latched onto Elena's arm and pulled her out into the open. "What do you think you're doing young lady?" Miranda questioned, one eyebrow raised and a concerned look on her face. She let go of Elena's arm and apologized._

"_I'm making myself beautiful." The little girl answered all too sweetly as she ran her fingers through her long brown hair._

"_You're the most beautiful girl in the world." Her mother smiled. "How could you possibly become any more beautiful?"_

"_By making my hair look like Angelica's Barbie doll—Cynthia."_

"_But hunny, she only has half of her hair. It's missing in most places." She pointed out, trying to take her daughter's mind off the idea._

"_Angelica calls her beautiful all the time. If she says it, it must be true." Elena whispered, glancing down at the scissors in her hand. "It's different from all the other girls' hair. I want to be different. And I want to be called beautiful too." _

"_And you are different." Miranda pointed out, but in the nicest way she could. "You're you and that's what makes you special. I love your hair the way it is and I wouldn't change a thing about your body. Now please, pass mom the scissors."_

"_Am I really beautiful?" She asked, her face lighting up._

"_Like I said, the most beautiful girl in the world. Anybody would agree with me too." Elena smiled at her mother's words. Her mom was who she looked up to—her role model. "And you have to remember that, always and forever. You don't have to do anything because you'll always be beautiful," She assured her._

"_It's true." Her baby brother agreed, walking into the kitchen. "You're very beautiful 'Lena."_

"_Thanks, Jer!" Elena exclaimed all too excitedly while handing her mom the scissors. "Here mom, I don't want these anymore. If two people called me beautiful while my hair was like this then it must be true!" She was so happy. "I love my hair now."_

"_I love your hair!" Jeremy squeaked. "It's so long and brown and shiny."_

"It's so long and brown and shiny." Jeremy exclaimed before him and Elena bust into a fit of laughter.

"I was so close to ruining it." Elena remembered. "I'm glad you and mom talked me out of it."

"Me too." Jeremy sighed. "If not, I would've had a sister that looked like one of those troll dolls." He laughed and looked at Elena. "I was being honest you know, your hair is really beautiful, 'Lena. And no matter what happens, you'll still be the most beautiful girl I've met, because your real beauty is inside you."

"Hey!" She yelled, still laughing. "It wouldn't have looked that bad. But thank you, for believing in me, Jer. You've been by my side since like forever. But hey, I really wouldn't have looked that bad."

"Yes you would have." Her brother argued.

"Ugh, whatever. She rolled her eyes jokingly. "You're supposed to be on my side. You called me the most beautiful girl in the world. You're supposed to think that whether I have hair or not."

"And I will always think that Elena." Jeremy whispered solemnly. "You're my sister. There's nobody out there in comparison to you whether you have all your hair, half of your hair or none of your hair. You'll always be my sister and you'll always be gorgeous." Her heart melted at her brothers words. He always knew the right things to say. She began to get emotional but she wouldn't let it get the best of her. She was such a sap sometimes, even when she shouldn't be. She hugged him tightly, and he hugged her back, tightening his grip on her as a form of reassurance. She loved it when he hugged her. It was like he never wanted to let her go.

"Thank you" She whispered. "I don't know where'd I be if it weren't for you, you know that?" She was still pulling him closer and giving him her bear hug, and at that moment all she wished for was to just stay happy forever, and stay alive. She deserved that, right? She had barely lived...

"And I don't know where I'd be if it weren't for you, Elena." He answered back quietly. "You took me in when I had nowhere to go. You helped me when I had nobody to turn to and when times and life got tough, you were my shoulder to lean on. You've helped me recover and I don't know where I would be today if it weren't for you." This time, it was too much for Elena to remain calm without shedding a tear. "I'll always help you in a heartbeat, 'Lena. I will _always_ be here, because I owe you that much. You made so many sacrifices so that I could continue studying and so that I live a healthy lifestyle. I know I've never directly thanked you for that, but I am now. And I appreciate every single thing you've done for me throughout these years. You're my light, Elena. My guide."

She sobbed into her brother's chest, soaking his shirt with her tears, those sweet words filling her heart with courage and love. "I love you, Jeremy. Thank you for being here."

"Stop your crying." Jeremy demanded playfully. "You're going to ruin your make-up. Don't you have somewhere to go? Otherwise you wouldn't have spent the last hour in the bathroom. You know what, you better have somewhere to go, because if not then I had spent the last hour waiting to use the bathroom for nothing."

Elena pulled away from her brother and wiped her eyes. "Yes I do." She giggled. "Damon has invited—no, more like insisted that I go to his place for dinner."

"Can he cook?" Her brother asked not asking questions about what had went on between them the previous week. Elena had filled him in on everything the morning after she came down from the roof. She told him almost everything and he had been concerned that week because she hadn't been her usual self. He was happy to hear that things were beginning to look up for her. He didn't know if she should be rushing into something as quick as she was, but she had insisted that they were taking it slow. But he was happy. His sister needed a distraction with everything that was going on and she needed somebody apart from him, to lean on and to talk to. And Damon being her doctor—was a bonus. He still had his doubts, even though he was younger than her sometimes Jeremy saw himself as her father figure. He worried about her always, even before she was diagnosed with cancer. When she went on dates, he was always wary, but he knew that his sister was not a child, she could take care of herself.

"His last name is Salvatore." Elena reminded him. "Doesn't that tell you anything?"

"It tells me he's Italian…"Jeremy began and then it dawned on him. His face dropped. "Oh."

Elena laughed. "You can be such a goof ball sometimes, you know that? But I need to finish getting ready. I've probably ruined my make up and I still haven't picked out what to wear yet and it's…" She glanced at her watch. "… ten to six which means I'm almost guaranteed to be late." She rushed back into the bathroom not bothering to let Jeremy answer her and opened her makeup case quickly.

She glanced in the mirror and cursed herself for tearing up. Her mascara had run and her eyeliner was half way down her face. Not like it'd be hard to fix but it did put her behind a couple minutes. When she was finished touching up her make-up, she moved onto the next problem—her hair. It was depressing to see what had fallen out, but no more had come out so she was at least thankful for that. She separated her hair in preparation for straightening it and while she did that, she moved pieces around in search for bald spots but luckily, there were not… yet. She sighed in relief and began to straighten her hair as quickly but as gently as she possibly could, trying to make up for time but also trying not to disturb anymore from falling. When she finished, she brushed it all out once more, looked at her brush to assure herself that no more had fallen out, closing her eyes and taking a deep breath before looking. She sighed happily when there were no more hairs. She practically ran to her bedroom and tore her closet upside down, in search for the perfect dressy-yet-not-too-dressy outfit for her evening at Damon's.

She settled on a simple dress she had bought on sale the month before for a great bargain. She had fallen in love with it as soon as she laid on eyes on it but there had been no opportunity until now for her to show it off. It was a mid thigh length dress, satin and purple. But it had a funky yet elegant twist to it. While one side was sleeveless, the other side was long-sleeved but the sleeve was black lace and the black lace peeked out of the dress at the top of the chest and the torso. The lace was entirely underneath the purple silk but only appeared in those two places. She loved it and she accompanied it with white pearl earrings and a matching pearl bracelet that she had bought at her favorite store—forever 21. Looking at the mirror, Elena felt good and looked good. She was still beautiful, she reminded herself. Damon would like her in this outfit.

She grabbed her cell phone, compact and hair comb and tossed it in her brown leather purse before slinging the purse over her side and rushing to the door. She quickly decided on wearing white lace flats to complete the look. She glanced at her fossil watch, ten after six. She would only be about twenty minutes late, he had told her the directions to his place and it wasn't too far from hers. Still, she felt bad for arriving late on such a nice occasion.

Wow, that had to of been the faster she had ever gotten ready in her entire life. She smiled to herself. Damon really was the best thing for her, in many different ways.

"Don't wait up for me if I'm not home early, Jer!" Elena called out, opening the door.

"You better come home!" Her brother's voice warned her. "Because spending the night at his house would mean one thing and one thing only! Sex, and it's too early to be doing that yet. And I don't want you getting pregnant, because I'm not that old to actually be an uncle."

"Jeremy!" Elena yelled, pronouncing every syllable in his name perfectly.

"Have a good night!" He laughed back.

She shook her head, laughing at her brother. He definitely was a goof ball.

* * *

"Good evening." Damon greeted her at the door, leaning in to give her a simple kiss. He was so formal, and when his lips brushed against hers she smelled his lovely scent, and it immediately consumed her.

"Hi." She whispered, blushing. "I'm late aren't I?"

He glanced at his Rolex watch. "Just barely—it doesn't matter. Come on, dinner's on the table." He motioned her to follow him and so she did, getting a little tour of his condo as they made their way to the dining area.

"Your place is really nice." She said encouragingly. "Who knew that a guy could have such a neat, clean place? I can't imagine you cleaning."

"I'll let you in on a little secret." Damon stopped and whispered into her ear. "I'm a little OCD when it comes to that kind of stuff."

"So you're kind of a neat freak?" Elena asked playfully.

He nodded and started walking again. "I'm kind of a neat freak."

All of a sudden he stopped dead in his tracks and Elena nearly bumped into him. "I almost forgot something." He said while turning around.

"And what's that?" She asked him, still laughing from earlier.

He closed the distance between them and enveloped her in a hug. "I almost forgot to tell you how absolutely stunning you look."

He still caught her off guard every time he gave her a compliment and to be honest, he surprised himself. He wasn't used to saying nice thing to women. Scratch that, he wasn't even used to being on dates. It was usually one night stands. He noticed Elena had turned away from him. He knew what she was hiding.

"You're blushing aren't you?"

"Me?" She raised her voice a couple octaves. "Never."

"Then turn around and look at me." He said folding his arms. She couldn't see the smirk that was plastered on his face but it was there.

"I have something in my eye." She tried to lie.

"Well turn around and let me see. I'll get it out for you." He offered, knowing there was no way she could get around that. He smiled, feeling victorious.

"I don't want to." She laughed.

"That's because you're blushing! Admit it." He laughed, grabbing her and trying to make her face him. He finally felt her smile.

"Damon, no!" She giggled.

"See, I told you that you were blushing." He said when he finally spotted her rosy red cheeks and pinched them.

* * *

"There's something I forgot to tell you." Elena grinned as she took another bite of the amazing spaghetti that Damon had made for them. It was easy to tell he truly was Italian because the food was to _die_ for. The pasta was cooked the right way, and the sauce was amazing.

"Would it be how _orgasmic_ my food tastes?" He said suggestively, wiggling his eyebrows.

"No." She frowned but quickly smiled.

"What then?"

Shyly, she whispered. "I completed one of the things on my list."

"Really?" He asked, surprised. He took a sip of wine and swallowed soundly. "Which one was it?"

"Camping out under the stars." She told him. "That's what we did that night on the roof. I know it wasn't actually camping but it was the closest I'll ever get. And I'm happy with it." She smiled, content that that was the start to completing the main things she wanted to do before she… died. She grabbed his hand, pushing the dreadful thoughts away. "And it was with you. I wouldn't have it any other way. It was perfect."

"Me either." He whispered. To be honest, he didn't really know what else to do. She was stunning every moment of everyday. Everything she did was perfection and he adored her beyond comprehension. Right then and there, he would probably have been able to say that he loved her but he wouldn't go that far with it yet. He adored her sure, he cared for her exclusively and he cherished the ground she walked on. He was happy for her. Happy that 'some silly list' she had apparently just made up because she was bored was finally started to be completed. He'd make sure if not all—then most would be completed with him. He already had that in mind. Elena would do all of the things she had scribbled down on that list. And it wouldn't be her 'last wishes' as she called it. It'd be the start of doing what you always wanted to do. He wouldn't let her call those wishes her last, because if so, then it would mean that he had lost her, and he wasn't going to let her die. He was going to make her feel better and he was going to start over, making sure that those wishes would be repeated He knew deep in his heart that she was going to push away this cancer, she was going to rid herself of it. The chemo was going to work, the eventual bone marrow transplant would work if need be. She was a strong fighter, he knew that—he sensed that. He didn't dare think of their time together as limited. Because it was precious and it would last. Also, Elena was his little miracle, she was changing his life. If God really did exist, he would be pleased that his life was finally right, and that he has one woman in his life. So he wouldn't dare take her away from him, right?

"I remember me and my brother went camping one time." Elena had start, snapping Damon out of his thoughts. "Our parents took us. We had a lake house but we pitched tents the first night to get the real 'camping' experience. And roasted marshmallows and wieners on the campfire and we sang songs all night. It was amazing, even the night was so beautiful."

"That sounded like fun." Damon said quietly knowing that Elena wouldn't really hear him. She looked like she was reliving a memory and she was. It was one of happiest and last memories they had together.

"_There is a house in New Orleans_

_They call it the rising sun_

_And it's been the ruin of many a poor boy_

_And God I know I'm one_

_My mother was a tailor_

_She sewed my new blue jeans_

_My father was a gamblin' man_

_Down in New Orleans._

_Now the only thing a gambler needs  
Is a suitcase and trunk  
And the only time he's satisfied  
Is when he's on a drunk_

Oh mother tell your children  
Not to do what I have done  
Spend your lives in sin and misery  
In the House of the Rising Sun

Well, I got one foot on the platform  
The other foot on the train  
I'm goin' back to New Orleans  
To wear that ball and chain

Well, there is a house in New Orleans  
They call the Rising Sun  
And it's been the ruin of many a poor boy  
And God I know I'm one."

_The entire Gilbert family besides Jeremy finished singing and started clapping and laughing. Elena had the voice of an angel._

"_Where'd you learn that song, 'Lena?" Grayson had asked while retrieving yet again another marshmallow and popping it onto the stick he used to roast them._

"_I heard it on the radio one day when I was doing my homework and it just stuck. How do you know it?" She asked back. Elena had the voice of an angel, but she loved singing with her parents. They were truly a happy family and she knew that her parents would die for her and her brother._

"_Are you kidding me?" Miranda cut in. "That song's a classic!"_

"_Is it originally by The Animals?" Jeremy asked. "There's too many different covers, I wasn't sure which one was the original."_

"_To be honest." Grayson started. "I'm not really sure. According to all the rock legends and such, nobody knows just exactly where that song came from. You guys have heard smoke on the water, right?"_

"_Yes." Jeremy and Elena nodded in unison. Elena looked up in the sky and noticed how clear all of the stars were. She could pick out a couple constellations and the North Star. It was beautiful. _

"_Well that's the same idea with that song. Everybody performs a cover of it and everybody knows it, but yet nobody knows who wrote it."_

"_That's pretty freaky." Jeremy said. "It'll always be a mystery."_

"_That's what's so special about it." Grayson told him—them. _

"_So who's up for a third song?" Miranda asked enthusiastically._

"_No!" The other three cried._

"_Why not?" She pouted and crossed her arms._

"_All we've been doing is singing. It's fun but I want to keep my voice." Elena joked._

"_Ugh, you guys are party poopers."_

"_But you love us." Elena pointed out as if to remind her._

"_Of course I do." Miranda smiled. "With all of my heart. I would do anything for both of you."_

"That camping trip was on a weekend, May 24th to be exact. That would be a month before their death." Elena whispered.

"Your parents would be proud, you know." Damon offered. "Of you. Of whom you've become. They raised you right. You are a good woman, Elena."

"I'm not so sure about that." Elena said, her bottom lip quivering a little.

"Hey." Damon cooed, grabbing her hand. "They would be. Look how much you've achieved since their death "Lena! You're a CEO of a multi-million dollar company, you take care of Jeremy while he attends college, you're stunning, you're smart, and you're kind."

"And I have leukemia." She pointed out.

"That doesn't matter." He coldly said before softening up again. "That doesn't change who you are. You're still you, Elena. You're still amazing. Your parents would be proud and they know how strong you are. I like everything about you, Elena. I like the way you smile, and the way you try to hide your pain so that you don't burden people with your problems...But let me tell you this, Elena. There will not be a second that I won't be there with you during this fight. I will stand by you every second, do you understand?"

She smiled at him, and nodded a thank you. "You think so?" She asked, lifting her eyes from the table and meeting with his, "You really think that my parents would be proud of me?"

"I know so."

Then, without any indication of what was happening, Elena jumped up out of her seat with her hands over her mouth and ran to the bathroom closing the door behind her. She didn't think she would've made it to the toilet in time but some how, she did. She lifted the cover and the contents of her stomach—including the amazing meal she had just eaten, reappeared. She urged and she urged until nothing came out but water and eventually nothing came out at all. Her throat was raw from urging and her stomach was churning.

"Elena!" Damon yelled from just beyond the door. "Let me in."

"No, Damon." She coughed back. "You don't want to see this."

"I don't care! Let me in there with you."

Not knowing if she had the strength to reach and unlock the doorknob, she attempted to do just that. When she did, she repositioned herself over the toilet again once she felt her stomach churning. Just as Damon walked again, more vomit that she didn't knew she had left poured out from her mouth. Damon ran to her and knelt beside her, holding her hair and rubbing her back as she puked. Elena began urging so much that tears started to pour from her eyes. Finally, she was back to the stage where nothing would come up when she urged. And that signaled the end of her episode because there wasn't any more food that could possibly come back up. That was it, from this moment on, there will be no more Elena Gilbert-only cancer. Cancer will control her life.

She ripped of a few strands of toilet paper and wiped her mouth, then her nose and then her eyes. With separate tissue, of course.

"Damon." Elena whispered, slowly turning to face him before practically leaping into his lap with the tears still in her eyes. "It's starting!"

* * *

**AN: Thanks to Amy(LiveBreatheVampire) for her amazing work as always, check her out :)**

**Also, just in case. The song 'house of the rising sun' is no way, mine. **

**Hope this made up for the short, last chapter I had. I think this one turned out fairly well, hope you thought so as well. Let me know :) **


	11. XI

**I need you to be my miracle**

**XI**

* * *

"There's no easy way to explain this, Elena." Damon cuddled her, playing with her soft hair as she sobbed and cried into his shoulder. She had been a mess ever since the incident and they had been sitting on the couch ever since. Not many words were exchanged between them because Damon didn't know what to say and Elena didn't exactly want to say or hear anything. All he could do was hold her. He couldn't even try to soothe and comfort her any more because she didn't seem to believe what he was telling her. His heart broke at the sight of this precious woman crying. He wanted to erase all kind of pain; physical and emotional, but he couldn't. The thought frustrated him more than anything else. He was a doctor, and he couldn't make it go away. Yes, because you're a doctor, not a miracle worker, his subconscious reminded him lightly. As much as he wanted and believed to, he was no miracle worker. Then, she had eventually asked him what was causing this. And now he was in doctor mode. "Your chemotherapy is targeting any cell in your body that is increasing at an unusually rapid rate. That's how cancer grows, it mutates and mutates and keeps spreading. You still with me?" She nodded. "Good. The cells that cause your hair to grow always constantly replace themselves at a steady fast pace. And the chemo cannot detect which is cancer and which is normal so it goes for all of the cells."

"So I'm losing hair for no reason?" She wept and huffed and pouted all at the same time. Damon would've called her cute if she weren't in such a foul mood.

"No, Elena." Damon hugged her tighter. "You're losing it because your body can't tell the difference between the cancer cells and your hair cells. Both multiply faster than normal cells do. It's unfortunate but it's the way of chemotherapy."

"I can't lose all my hair Damon. Imagine what I'll look like-"

"You'll look gorgeous." He cut her off. "With or without your hair, Elena… you are still you. Hair can be grown back, a wig can be worn… there are so many alternatives. Don't think of this as the worst side affect because it isn't. Just remember that you are going through this so that you can be healthy again."

"It's too hard to be positive." She folded her arms and huffed. "Not with everything going wrong."

"It'll get better, Elena-." Damon attempted to soothe her.

"Save it, Damon." She hissed sadly. "No, it won't." They remained in silence for a moment. "Why am I throwing up?"

"Because of the chemotherapy agents circulating in your blood stream." Damon answered so easily. "Your body obviously isn't use to it. It's hard work for the body to break it down. Even the sight and apparent smell of the chemo can make you nauseous but it can occur at any time. Obviously." He pointed out, referring to just now.

She sighed. "It'd be easier if my body just quit already and gave up trying." That earned her a very hard glare from Damon. Her words were so angry and painful that she almost regretted saying them to him—in front of him.

"I don't ever want to hear you say that again." He said sternly. "Do you understand? You're going to beat this. I know you will. You can't give up, Elena. I won't let you give up. You're a fighter."

"It's too hard, Damon." She exclaimed. "And it's only the beginning. I'm not going to be able to do it."

"Yes you will." He assured her, grabbing her hand tightly. "And I'll be here every step of the way. I told you that. I promise you I will. I will get you through this, but I need you to have faith in me and in yourself. Fight back. If you believe you aren't strong enough then you won't be and you won't have any more of a chance at beating this than the man in the moon. Trust me, Elena and have a little faith."

Elena looked away from the man she was falling for so fast and stared at the hem of her dress, and fumbled with it. Part of her was scared for the cancer and what it would do to her. This was all so new, she hadn't had a health issue in her life prior to now. But the other part of her was scared on account of Damon.

He made her feel things the past few weeks—things she didn't think she'd ever feel. And the feelings were coming so fast! She cared for him deeply already and he seemed like he cared for her equally as much, which was the scary part. She had cancer and there was a chance she could die. She was scared that it would break him again, that she will eventually leave him all alone. Most of all she was scared for herself...She had barely lived, for God's sake. There was a big possibility that she might not grow old, marry and have children like a woman deserved to do and have. The thought that future with Damon might just be an illusion made tears prick the corner of her eyes. No, her hopes wouldn't stay hopes, right? There will be a future for them, there had to be. What made her have hope was the fact that he still continued to pursue his said feelings for her. She didn't want to hurt him and she didn't want to leave him, she just hoped that whatever treatment he had her on would work. Because, that was her only hope in surviving her life and surviving their 'love'.

"May I add?" Damon cut through her thoughts, startling her a little. He'd noticed she was in deep thought and she looked upset. He wanted to cheer her up. "I'm a miracle worker." He knew he wasn't, but he was going to try to be. Just for her.

"I need you to be my miracle, Damon." She whispered.

The difference in their tones was immaculate. He had been playful and cheerful whereas she had been serious and pleading. He took this as her way of saying she was truly and deeply worried. She was giving up. No, she couldn't do that. He didn't want her to be. He grabbed her tiny waist and pulled her on top of him and held her face between his hands, forcing her to look at him.

"We'll get through this together, Elena." He promised and searched her face for her belief. "Don't you understand? I can't let anything happen to you."

"And why is that?" She found herself asking quietly.

"Because I love you." He had blurted out way too quick for his own good. He winced and looked at her reaction.

She had been taken aback by his words. That was noted. "I'm sorry…" He trailed. "I shouldn't have said that. It was… too soon. I didn't mean to startle you, Elena..."

"Shh." Now it was her time to cup his face and force him to look at her. She took a deep breath and smiled. "What we have is weird, hell is it ever. We found 'this'". She gestured with her hands. "…in a clinic for people with cancer. And 'this' is love. It hasn't been long and we haven't spent that much time together but I know what I'm feeling, Damon. My feelings for you are strong and I wouldn't classify them any differently than you did just now. I love you too. And if there is a future for me, I can only picture you in it."

She leaned in for the typical declare-your-love-for-one-another-then-make-out-senselessly kind of kiss and did just that, with everything she had in her.

One thing led to another and somewhere between the needy kisses and the heated touches, half their clothes were stripped leaving both of them only in their underwear and in Damon's room atop of his bed—panting for air that the kisses wouldn't allow them. His hands roamed down her body, and he was incredibly gentle with her. He had never been this gentle and loving in all his life-and he was a very experienced man indeed. But kissing Elena, tasting Elena was different. Maybe it was because it's simply Elena. Maybe it was because he loved her. He didn't know that, but nothing else mattered. His world was now focused on the little brunette in his arms.

* * *

"Say that again." Elena whispered. Damon was gazing down at her as his body shadowed over hers. She watched as the beads of sweat trickled down the sides of his face and roll down under his chin. She too, was equally as heated. Her hair was one big drenched mess and her face was more likely than not—flushed but she didn't care. He had told her countless times over the last hour that she was beautiful just how she was. And for that hour, she forgot all about her problems.

"I love you." He cutely smiled at her in between deep breaths. Their rhythm stayed consistent. It was unbelievable how well they knew each other's bodies. He knew just how forceful to go—how quick—how slow. And not once did he take his eyes off of her. Except for when he ravished her body in kisses that made her giggle with delight.

Elena felt like she was on cloud nine, soaring far above anything and everything that could hurt her from here on out. If there was such a thing as perfection, these moments were it. "I'll never get sick of hearing you say that." She told him, leaning up and kissing his cheek.

"And I'll never get tired of saying it." He smirked, rubbing his face against hers. His eyebrows furrowed. "You're cold." Without letting her say anything, he threw a blanket over them and grabbed her so that her back was pressed tightly against his chest. His arms went around her, holding her around the waist. He placed kisses on her neck and breathed in her scent, and then he laid there, quietly listening to her breathing.

The silence that followed was welcomed between them. It wasn't awkward or deafening but it was peaceful and fulfilling. They were consumed in one another, physically and spiritually. There could have been a million other people in the room with them but they wouldn't have even noticed.

Sex hadn't been that long ago for Damon. In fact, it'd just been shy of a few weeks but this—what they were doing, this wasn't sex. This was pure and whole-hearted love-making one hundred percent and truth be told, it was the first time Damon had ever made love. He slept with women, yes, but he had never made love. He had never been so gentle and selfless and held a woman like he was holding Elena right now-like a lifeline. He had never wanted a woman to stay all day or night in bed with him. But with Elena he could lay in there for weeks. He knew the difference of it of course, he knew even before he started it would be different. His feelings toward this woman—this splendid woman, were foreign. He didn't do feelings. Hearts and flowers and gifts were not associated with him. All that came with him was liquor, money and his dick, to be blunt. And normally all women were to him, were tits, ass, and a good lay to take his mind off his never-ending loneliness. The women he bedded were just a distraction from the harsh, lonely world he lived in. But Elena was light, light and hope.

Elena wasn't any woman. What he felt while having sex—making love with her… couldn't be described if his life depended on it. He thought the 'bond' between two people was a bunch of bull shit but he finally and clearly understood what they meant. He felt connected to her, in ways he would never be connected to anybody else. Was it too sure? Probably. Was he scared? Fuck, yes. But he didn't care because love normally doesn't just fall at your finger tips. But he had been lucky, for once in his life. He didn't think he deserved the chance with somebody like her but he sure as hell didn't say that.

He thought back to when he realized he first started developing feelings for Elena, which would probably of been somewhere around him finding out she had went to dinner with Stefan. He had been jealous and he didn't do jealous so right then and there, something was up. He knew that, and he tried to act cold and act like it was nothing. He wanted to believe it was brother rivalry, that'd be no surprise. But when he decided to ignore her, he had planned on cutting her out of his life. He had intended on 'fucking' her and even when he found that out he was going to scratch that idea off his 'list' and give her the chuck. But his bad moods worsened the longer he went without talking to her and he didn't want to admit that to himself. Until he eventually had to. And then him being smart and all put two and two together and realized he was lashing out the way he was—was because he had feelings for her.

He cringed every time he thought about his first impression of Elena. A hot girl that looked hard to fuck—but he'd crack her open regardless because he was a charmer. He felt disgusted with himself thinking of that and wished he could take it all back but in a weird sort of way he was glad. He was ashamed that he had thought so low of this delicate woman, but he knew that if he hadn't pursued her, he would never have developed feelings for her and gotten to know her the way he did. He still had a lot to find out about her but he planned on doing just that.

He'd also taken a big risk having feelings for a patient—a one with cancer of all illnesses. But she was his to fix. And he didn't look at her as a job or a task. He looked at her as a person that needed to be saved—and in the process of that, she would save him as well. He knew the risks and he knew what was in for them, but he didn't care. He was going to do everything in his power to have her healthy again.

"Elena." Damon mumbled into her hair, breaking the silence. "I am so close."

"Me too." She agreed, moaning in satisfaction as he continued to penetrate her.

"Come with me, 'Lena." He demanded. And she did, right then and there she fell apart. Her mind fuzzed and her reality twisted for a few moments into some oblivion-like state as did he. His proof of fulfillment shot into her body as his breathe began to normalize.

They lay in silence for a while, soaking in each other's body heat and clammy bodies but they didn't care. They were recuperating and being intimate with one another all over again. The closeness was something they definitely could get used to and they both planned on it.

Elena startled Damon when she abruptly jumped out of bed and ran out of the room. A couple moments later she ran back with a pen and a piece of paper in hand and lid back in bed, leaning again Damon as she opened the list. He soon saw that it was her last wishes list. But why?

He raised an eyebrow. "Why did you go get that just now?"

"So I can do this." She pointed to the sheet and with her pen she scratched out, yet again; another wish on her list.

Last Wishes...

#1. Go on an African safari.

**#2. Camp out under the stars. **

#3. Go to an all-you-can-eat-buffet and eat until I puke.

**#4. Fall in love, unconditionally and recklessly.**

#5. Have sex in the bathroom of an air plane.

#6. See Metallica live.

#7. Parasail.

When he noticed what she had crossed off, he looked at her and noticed she was smiling—more like gleaming at him. It was cute and heart-warming.

"What we have is kind of reckless, isn't it?" He asked, smirking.

"Dangerously." Elena agreed.

"And what we have is kind of unconditional too, isn't it?"

"Of course." She smiled, leaning in for a kiss. "And I wouldn't have it any other way."

"I have an idea." Damon exclaimed. "We're going to check off another wish on that list of yours tomorrow evening."

"How?" She asked, unsure of where he was going with this.

"We are going to The Mandarin."

"Damon, no!" Elena shook her head. "That place would cost like two hundreds dollars for the two of us."

"So?" His face twisted and then he smirked, of course. "It's not like I can't afford it. Besides, its worth it don't you think? You'll be one step closer to completing that silly list of yours."

"It isn't sill-"

"I know." He silenced her with his finger against her mouth. "I'm just messing with you." But she latched onto his finger and nibbled on it, and then sucked it in and out of her mouth, tantalizing Damon. He felt himself grow hard again at the sight of her actions and he didn't know if he had the energy to go again, nor would she. "I'd suggest you stop that right now if you know what's best for you."

She watched his eyes darken with lust and it delighted her, knowing she could turn him on so easily. "Maybe I don't know what's best for me."

"Apparently not." He said out loud.

"But I digress." She laughed it off. "What were you saying about The Mandarin? Do you seriously want to go there? I could pay for my meal."

"Nonsense, it's nothing. I'd love to take you, Elena." He smiled. "I want to do things like that with you more often than not. I want to spend every minute of every day with you, and right now, I want to make you happy."

"Me too." She peered back, her doe eyes glazing into his.

"Oh no." She whispered to herself.

"What is it?" Damon asked, kind of amused.

"I put on the list." She looked down at it "…go to an all-you-can-eat-buffet and eat until I puke."

"Yeah, and?"

"I don't want to eat so much I throw up; I shouldn't have put that on there."

"Maybe we can make an exception." Damon suggested, shrugging his shoulders. "After all, I don't want to see my kitten sick any more than she has to be."

"Kitten?" She asked. Now it was her turn to be amused. Damon didn't seem like the nick name giving type.

"Yes, kitten. You're my kitten." He nodded. "You're soft, warm, cuddly and precious and all mine."

"I like that." She smiled, truthfully liking the ring it had to it. It made her feel special.

"As do I." He smirked. "As do I."

* * *

Damon lay in silence, one arm under the back of his head. Elena had fallen asleep and was now curled up to him, one arm over his naked torso. He squeezed her and pulled her closer, and she smiled in her sleep. His head was spinning with rage, confusion, and at the same time happiness. He was happy-He had gotten the girl. But at the same time, he was scared. Even though he had tried to be strong, he knew the consequences of chemo. He knew that soon, her beautiful body was going to start bruising and that she'll be in severe pain. He looked at her and his heart ached. She was an angel, a gift from God; he couldn't believe that she was sick. Even in her sleep with her hair tousled, she still looked beautiful.

He got off the bed and smiled, getting a bright idea. Kissing her knuckles softly, he threw a shirt on and went to the kitchen, taking out the ingredients to make Chicken Parmesan. He had learnt to make this recipe from his mother, and he hadn't done it in a very long time. Being busy as a doctor and in a world of solitude, Damon didn't usually cook, though he loved it. Before Elena, he lived on alcohol and pre-cooked food. But ever since she came into his life, he had managed to go food-shopping. He took the ingredients to make this delicious bake. Then, smiling softly Damon opened the package he had bought for Elena-a red, strapless dress. He wrapped it in the box and tip-toed to the room, leaving it on the bed with a note.

* * *

Elena woke up to an amazing smell of something baking. She rubbed her eyes and discovered that it was about eight pm. She glanced around, and to her disappointment, Damon wasn't there. But then she saw a note written on red paper and she smiled.

_Hello, kitten. Open the package I have left for you, and join me downstairs in fifteen minutes. I love you._

Elena opened the package curiously and stared in astonishment at the red dress she found. It was amazing and it looked expensive. As she put it on, it hugged her body features as if it was made for her. Damon knew how to choose. Throwing it on, she sprayed her favorite perfume thankful that she had carried it with her in her purse and lightly arranged her smudged make up.

As she descended down the stairs, she found Damon dressed like a groom waiting for her. He rose at the sight of her, took her hand and placed a gentle kiss on her cheek.

"What is all of this, Damon?" She smiled softly.

"This is for us, Elena," He smiled, pulling out a chair for her. "For our future." He served the chicken parmesan and Elena's mouth watered. Her man could cook.

They ate and smiled, clicking their glasses of carbonated water with lime since Elena obviously couldn't drink. As a desert, he offered her a fruit flan, and Elena was surprised at how he had managed to do this in just a few hours. Yes, her man was talented. She could hear soft music playing in the background.

"Within Temptation," She smiled, "You knew that I liked them. How?"

"I have talents you'll never dream of," He winked. "Dance with me."

And she did. As the soft voice of Sharon Den Adel came through the speakers she let herself lay in his arms, taken away to an alternate dimension. That was their song. She noted that if she ever had the chance to walk down the aisle towards him, this would be their song they danced to. It was perfect in so many ways. He slipped a finger under her chin and kissed her softly as they swayed softly with the music.

And at that moment, she let herself believe that everything was going to be all right.

* * *

**A/N:**

**I apologize greatly for my sudden and long disappearance(well didn't that just sound awfully proper lol). I had a major writer's block along with tests upon tests but I sat my ass down last night and made myself finish this chapter. And after a while, it came along easier but I still didn't know how to end this chapter to a big thanks to my beta, Amy for doing the last scene and adding all your awesomeness into it. I wanted to keep this chapter a while longer and try to double it in length but god only knows how long that would've took and i don't want you mad at me :)**

**So, tell me what you thought of this chapter :) AND I know this story is rated M so do you guys want more of the sex scenes or less? Cause If I add more I may add TOO much, lol. But let me know, xoxo :)**


	12. XII

**I need you to be my miracle **

**XII**

* * *

"Are you almost ready, Elena?" Damon called from the other side of the bathroom door. He was getting a little impatient but he managed to stay calm. "You've been in there over an hour now!"

"I had to shower, silly." She called back playfully. "That takes time. I'm almost ready, I swear."

"You better be." He laughed. "Or else we're going to lose our reservation."

"Fuck!" She called from behind the door earning a hard chuckle and a snort from Damon. "Why the hell didn't you tell me we has reservations? When?!"

"Seven thirty." He answered cooly while she checked her watch and freaked out a little more.

"It's nearly seven. We're going to be late!" She squealed and Damon could hardly contain his laughter. He was glad he couldn't see her at this moment, he would have been hysterical.

"Not if you come out right now we won't." He offered. "You're going to look as beautiful as ever, I don't know why you're trying to look even better. It's not possible. Now come on, kitten."

As if she was compelled to do whatever he asked, he heard the door unlock and watched it open as his beautiful girlfriend stepped into his vision.

"You look amazing." He truthfully told her. But he always seen her as beautiful, nothing less.

"Thank you." She beamed. She was wearing the dress he had given her last night simply because he asked her to wear it. She argued saying she couldn't wearing something two days in a row but apparently that didn't count when you didn't put it on until late and it was on the floor within hours. And he begged-she had to give in. So she paired it with her white pearls, white lace heels and a sparkily white clutch. "I'm not too fancy, am I? I've never been to this resturant."

"No, you're perfect." He motioned her to the door and led her out of his condo, hand in hand-walking to his car. "This place is more formal than anything else. Everybody dresses up to go to The Mandarin although I don't know why." A puzzled look appeared on his face and he scratched his chin. "It's a buffett and people eat until they nearly explode. Why in the hell would you wear your tightest, fanciest clothes to a place that makes you feel fat when you're finished? I never got that..."

Elena laughed at his thoughts. "I have no idea but by the way you're talking, I'm glad this dress is stretchy."

"Oh you should be." Damon raised his eyebrows. "Because I have to unbutton my suit everytime."

"It can't be t_hat _bad." She playfully rolled her eyes.

"Just wait." He laughed. "Just wait."

* * *

"Ugh, I don't think I can eat another bite." Elena exclaimed as she rubbed her belly. "I must have at least five pounds put on."

"What'd I say?" He smirked.

"But..."

"What'd I say?" He repeated.

"Just wait." She looked down, laughing. "You said just wait."

"I am _always _right. Always!" He winked at her and motioned her to look at what he was doing. He was unbuttoning his pants. "You're not the only one with five pounds gained." And then a realization struck him. "Oh my god, Elena. We shouldn't have come! All that pasta is going to go _straight to my thighs._ I'm going to need to run a matathon after this!" He said all of this in his best imitation of a girl and if he was trying to enterain her, it worked. She always laughed at his jokes.

"I hope you're not making fun of me." She scoffed. "Because I sound _nothing _like that."

"You act nothing like it, either." He added. "Thank God you're not one of those crazy girls."

"I'd say." She groaned. "I looove food way too much to care about what I eat."

"That's my girl." He leaned over the table and she met him half way, sealing their conversation with a kiss.

"You know..." Damon looked over at the buffett tables. "There's a whole table of desserts."

"Shut up." She demanded. " Just shut up. You know I'm not going to be able to even look at dessert after what I just ate!"

"Three plates is nothing, Elena!" He teased.

"Really Damon? You're making fun of me?"

"Not at all." He held his hands up.

"You had four!" She threw at him.

"I am also a man." He added, his smug smirk coming into play.

"And a jerk." She pointed out.

"Hey!" He grabbed his chest. "I think you just ripped out my heart."

"Oh dear." She answered sarcastically before erupting into a giggle fit again. And then she remembered. "I almost forgot." She said pulling out the familiar sheet of folded paper.

"One more down." Damon smiled.

Last Wishes...

#1. Go on an African safari.

**#2. Camp out under the stars. **

#3. **Go to an all-you-can-eat-buffet and eat until I puke.**

**#4. Fall in love, unconditionally and recklessly.**

#5. Have sex in the bathroom of an air plane.

#6. See Metallica live.

#7. Parasail.

"There's only four left!" She exclaimed happily. "And so far they've all been done with you."

"And the rest will be too." He promised. "Even though you don't need too..."

"Save it." She didn't want to hear his whole 'you'll get better' speech. She knew he was saying it for the best and to keep her optimistic but she just couldn't look at it that way. Because if she didn't do these things and her time ended... as silly as it sounded-she'd feel as if she couldn't even accomplish a simple things on that list weren't _that_ hard to do although the airplane sex and metallica concert seemed a little farfetched but she'd _love_ to be able to say she did those things.

"All right." He laughed. He knew when to let it go. It was a very touchy subject for her and although they went over it a dozen times, she denied not doing it. She had her mind set and that girl, Elena-was very persistent and stubborn. "I'm just saying."

* * *

Over the next few weeks, Damon and Elena's relationship became stronger. They spent every minute they could with each other, and everything was going great between them. They learned things about each other they hadn't known.

Damon spoke fluent French and Itatlian. He went to Austrailia to examine a patient because somehow, halfway across the world he got recognized as one of the best oncologists in the world. He told the family that any doctor would be able to detect what he could but they requested him and paid for him. He was the top second in his whole graduating medical class. He loved sports growing up. He broke his arm twice, had dozens of stitches and he had half of a fake tooth because he fell down when he was ten in his concrete basement.

Elena knew french enough to get by. She didn't really fancy it. She was valedictorian in high school. She was on the cheerleading squad for her entire high school life. She had a dog ever since she was five, Marley and it lived until she was seventeen. She went to a Mexico Resort two spring breaks ago with Caroline and remained drunk the _entire_ trip. And her first car was an impala that her mother bought for her for getting her drivers liscense.

They knew so much about each other yet there was so much more to learn. They would lay in bed at night or hours upon hours just talking and reliving each of their childhoods and early adulthood-the other silently wishing they had been able to see it for themself.

And sometimes Damon would just hold her the entire night, no words would be spoke and it was enough. It was't awkward like you would think it'd be. It was relaxing. At other times they showed the love they had for each other, and it was always passionate. They would stay up all hours in the night, ravishing each other's bodies as if they were simply seeing it for the first time. The saying 'making love' had an entire different meaning now that they actually knew what it felt like. It felt like home-like heaven and every time they became one; they bonded even more. They couldn't describe it nor would they even try.

The perks of time passing by was prominent due to their blosseming relationship but was horrific with the evidence of Elena's wilting health. She was always fatigue and she was losing weight even though she ate as much as she could. But oftentimes, she couldn't keep it down. Sometimes she couldn't even keep a glass of water down. In fact, sometimes she could barely walk she was so weak. Her body would sometimes be tender all over causing excruciating pain even when she would sit or lay down. And it seemed more often than not, she was suffering in pure agony.

And what would cancer be without the very well known side affects...

"Damon! Oh my God!" Elena yelled from the bathroom one morning.

And he had ran to her, only to discover his beautiful mess of a girlfriend crying next to the sink, a bunch of hair in her hands. She had sobbed until she had almost collapsed, and Damon had cried with her, holding her fragile and bruised body offering her the security she needed. Times like that, he didn't know what else to do other than hold her. It broke his heart to see her in pain and distress.

Today though, she was feeling a little bit better, and in fact, she had spent the night at his place and he was making her a cup of hot coffee.

"You spoil me way too much," Elena rubbed her eyes and watched him put down a tray holding an egg and a coffee. Since she wasn't eating very much, she had managed to convince him that an egg was more than enough. He always urged her to eat a full breakfast-eggs, bacon, toast, pancakes, you name it. But once he realized the more she ate, the more she threw up... he agreed with her and fed her little portions to try and trick her body into thinking no food was going in therefore no food would be entitled to come back up. And it worked for the most part.

Today though…she felt hungry. That was a good sign.

"Are you coming here after work?" He asked her, stroking her cheek with his hand.

"Yes, if you don't mind," She added, taking a sip of the coffee with the whipped cream she loved.

"Of course I don't," Damon smiled at her, kissing her nose. "Do you think you're fine to go to work though?"

"Yeah," Elena nodded. "I can't stay here forever, Damon. I'll go crazy."

"If you feel sick, promise me that you'll call." He said, quite worried. "I still don't think it's a good idea for you to be going back so early."

"Damon, it's been weeks upon weeks. I can't just not go. Me and care _own_ the company. She can't have all the responsibilty. She'll crack. And I know this because I would crack if she weren't at work for periods on end! I'll be okay, I promise. It's an office job. I won't do a lot of moving around."

"Call me if you feel even the slightest bit nauseous or faint."

"I will." She oathed.

"And eat two or three small snacks before dinner."

"Okay." She rolled her eyes at him and laughed. He could be such a woman sometimes.

"I love you." He sighed. "Be careful."

"I'm just going to work, Damon. Not a war zone. Go to work, concentrate on that. I'll see you soon."

* * *

She arrived at work a bit late, and the second she entered the building she bumped into a muscular chest. Her files flew to the other side of the hall and Elena cursed, apologized and bent down to pick it up. The man bent down to help her and it was then that she realized that it was the one and only, Stefan Salvatore.

"Stefan," She said, picking up the paper.

"Elena…I haven't stopped thinking about you," He said honestly, reaching out to take her hand getting right to the point behind his appearance. "I want you to get to know me. I don't care about anything else."

"Stefan, I'm dating Damon now," Elena said firmly. "I love him, and he loves me."

"No, Elena, he doesn't. He will never love you. The only woman he loved was Katherine. He just wants your body, Elena, then he'll throw you away."

"How can you even say that?" Elena said, disgusted. "Your brother loves and respects me. I would never do anything to hurt him."

"You're making a terrible mistake, Elena. I can give you much more than Damon and you know that." He moved toward her, trying to close the distance between them.

"No, Stefan. Damon is the man I love. I'm sorry." She pushed him out of her way. "How did you even know I'd be here today? This is the first time in ages I've been to work."

"I come here every morning and dinner break hoping to see you. But then I check in with your secretary and realize you didn't show. You never show." He looked curious.

"Well, I've been busy." She shrugged. And with that, she walked away.

The second Elena entered her office, Caroline started to ask a million questions about her and Damon.

"We're doing great, Caroline…" Elena attempted to say, and the bubbly blonde smiled in excitement. "Tell me everything! Have you two had sex yet? How was it?"

"Is that all you think about, Caroline?" Elena asked, smirking. Her blonde friend loved sex, loved talking about sex, gossiping about sex, drooling over the opposite sex, etc. She was very bubbly but Elena knew how to take her.

"No," Caroline nodded, "I also think about food, for instance. And chocolate."

"I believe chocolate is a food." Elena lifted her finger.

"And it's also an aphrodisiac." She smirked which was followed by a wink. God, it looked so much better when Damon did that. Then her face got all serious-like. "Really, how are you guys doing?"

"Damon's been nothing shy of amazing, Care. He's absolutely perfect." She found herself smiling. "He listens to me, understands me. He talks to me, does couple stuff with me, you know? It's everything I've ever wanted.

And I know it wasn't the best way or time to meet him... but he understands and respects that too, you know? When I'm awake at three AM puking my guts up, he isn't asleep. He's beside me holding my hair. When I cry, he cries too. He's so comforting and he's making everything _so _much better."

"You sould like you're in love, 'Lena." She hadn't noticed Caroline was sat with her head resting between her two palms all lovey-dovey like and looking at Elena happily.

"Oh, you have no idea." Elena smiled. "He's changed my world-for the better. I know we haven't been together years like it takes most people to realize but he's the one, Care. I know it."

"Ahhh." The blonde squealed in delight. "I'm so happy for you."

"Thanks! He means the world to me. I honestly don't know what I'd do without him in my life."

"Let's hope you never have to find out."

* * *

Elena arrived home earlier than usual, and since Damon wasn't due home for another two hours she needed to entertain herself some how so she tidied up his condo and began on dinner.

When it was well past the time he was supposed to have already arrived home, an uneasy feeling settled in the pit of her stomach. It wasn't like him to be late and not call or text. But that feeling was short-lived because the door literally opened a minute later.

"Where were you?" She ran over to him and helped him shrugg off his coat. "You're late. I was beginning to worry."

"I have a surprise for you," He said excitedly.

"What?" She smiled.

Damon took out two tickets. "I bought them for us. There is a live Metallica concert in Italy, next Sunday. I arranged everything, even your leave. Before you say anything... I know you just went back to work and all but I figured this was more important." He waved the tickets in front of her face and sang. "My treat."

"Oh my God," She gasped, looking at the tickets in awe before jumping in his arms, causing the tickets to fall to the hardwood floor. "I never expected this in a thousand years. Thank you, thank you, thank you!"

* * *

**AN: I'm back, say what? Well... it's true. After being AWOL for over two months I can't even really explain myself. I lost interest in this story for a little while because I didn't know what to write for this chapter and then I just kept putting it off and off and off until I knew I HAD to update. So My great friend and beta, Amy; wrote me snipets of scenes that I could use to start it off and I filled them out :) So everybody thank her for this chapter! **

**I know my regular updates are usually longer than this but it'd probably take me another two months to double this. **

**I hope you all enjoyed it and are still baring with me! Sorry! **

**xoxo**


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